Oh my gosh. Well, if this isn't the greatest (and most difficult!) question to ask me, I don't know what is. [livejournal.com profile] midnightsjane asked me: "what your dream garden would look like if you had all the time and resources needed to create it. What would you include, and what would you leave out?"

WELL. *cracks knuckles* Loads of pics under the cut. :D My dream landscape - we're going beyond just a garden, yo. )

If you made it through that, mazel. :D ION, I want to point you to the original post asking for your questions as well as reminding you that we are still happily taking any and all donations you might be able to give to the writers of HDJM. ALL OF THAT CAN BE FOUND HERE.

Tomorrow's question: 3 defining moments of myself + Derek Hale's thoughts on sweaters. Ha! <3
I have cilantro growing strictly for the ladybugs. It's a great host plant for baby-making and baby-raising. The suburbs of the garden, if you will. (And you will.) Side note: I hate cilantro. Yes, I know about the genetics, blah blah soap, it's gross but someone I'm sure loves it, blah. Also, MILD INSECT PR0N IN THE LOWER RIGHT CORNER. (hahaha)

I failed to mention that the upper left critter is the ladybug baby (larva).

Now I'm making Transformer noises. (IDK, ladybug larva look like Autobots to me.) Nope, I'm singing Ladybugs Picnic. :D

*sits around telling knock-knock jokes*

Thanks to those who participated in the poll yesterday, including those that said they were NOT interested in my show. (And I can't help it, I have to laugh at the complete stranger who voted NOPE who has never set foot in my LJ before. Research is research, right? Right.)

Also live JOURNAL = the use of the word journal does not make us journalists. Unless you have a degree in journalism, in which case you obviously are one. But I still hold that LJ didn't make you a journalist. /bi-annual reminder that I'm just a person trying to make people laugh for the most part and should not be taken seriously

...unless I'm talking plants. Then you should. :)
And I'm not talking about rude people. I'm talking about BUGS. Well, not True Bugs (I love that that is an actual classification - sub order /nerd!) but caterpillars, the final instar stage of the beautiful butterfly/moth.

(Quick mention that I have an entire post dedicated to gardening tips. I don't have time to help people like I used to, so feel free to help yourself! :D [/your friendly neighborhood Master Gardener.]

A few years ago I came out to my garden, HORRIFIED by these massive...creatures that were eating my garden to the ground. Specifically, my tomato plants and my Datura (Angel's Trumpet.) I had to use TWO HANDS to pull these buggers off the plant stems, because they were on tight. I tossed them into my driveway, like I do when I find grubs. I've trained the mockingbirds, you see. When they see me come out side with tools, they line the fence and watch. I toss grubs (typically) up in the air, or on the sidewalk, and they swoop in and get an easy meal. Awesome.

These buggers didn't even hit the ground before there was a fight among the birds. Big meal, is what I'm saying. I thought these were common tomato hornworms - at first glance, they certainly look like them.

But I realized after letting a few live that they weren't. They didn't become gold/brown hawk moths. These particular caterpillars turn into hummingbird hawk-moths. They are BEAUTIFUL.

Well, they eventually are. Here are some phone camera shots. )

I have a lot of gardening to do, but I'm going to do it away from these things. If only to keep the mockingbirds occupied elsewhere...

(And this is my favorite shot that I've taken of a hummingbird - actual bird, see? - in my garden.) And this is my favorite collection of pics from my garden. :)

ION: PLEASE TELL ME YOU HAVE READ NEAR MISSES, WHICH WAS COMPLETED YESTERDAY. And then please tell me that you left her lovely comments, because that's just the right thing to do after being moved by such a fantastic and beautiful story. :) *cough* NOW ON EBOOK.
Which, when you click on the cut, you'll see why that's a big deal.

BIG storm rolled in last night for some much needed rain. I know that the majority of the US is in a drought, but Texas has been really hard hit for several years in a row. (Top it off with last year's rampant wildfires, and it's just awful out there for wildlife.) YAY RAIN! We're expecting it all week, too.

It was SO BRIGHT last night that I could sit on my porch with my Kindle at 10pm and read. I gave it up as a bad job, though, because electrical storms are gorgeous.

See?! Warning: it's HUGE so you can see the detail. )

ION, I am determined to not be sick any more. I do feel better, but UGH. I hate making myself lay around. I puttered in the garden (lol - used my spade to dig out saplings and tap roots to wild fennel) and looked up to find that two hours had gone by. Whoops! Zoned out. :) I need to take some pictures while the light is nice - after a rain is the best time for photos. <3 Oh, right: I went out there because it's Julia Child's birthday and I wanted some blossoms from my Julia Child rose bush to commemorate the day. I need to roast a chicken to fully honor her, though.

Last night I had a dream that I had fleas - I was so itchy. D: When I woke up, Smidgen was staring at me and her whiskers were poking my face. STOP GIVING ME DA EVOLS, CAT. /Vicky Pollard

OH HEY. AND WE'RE GOING TO START A REWATCH OF TEEN WOLF SEASON ONE ON HDJM. Liz is all over that, our Spartacus girl that Steven DeKnight fell in love with. :D

[ETA] I failed to mention here (I reblog on Tumblr, where most of Glee fandom is, but I've sworn off Tumblr for fear of spoilers) that you REALLY NEED TO BE READING NEAR MISSES. The latest chapter is here, and the masterlist of notes and all the chapters is HERE. I do not say this lightly: it is a master class in pacing, characterization, and story telling. Simply one of the best fics in the entire fandom, period. Stop waiting, if you are. You'll want to savor each chapter as they post (and today was 11 of 16, so it's coming close to an end!)
Because the front of my house is SO DELICIOUS. Roses, roses, roses. They're going bananas, and I couldn't be happier. Big ol' pics under the cut. Taken with my phone, so don't expect art. :D


HEY GUYS IT IS GORGEOUS OUTSIDE. I have no books to read. I want something fun, adventurous, and awesome. *chinfists* Whatcha got? I just blew through The Hunger Games for the 5th time (and man, I need to find fanfiction, because the ending is satisfactory, right?) Oooh, maybe I should re-read The Passage since Book 2 is coming out in June? O_O

eta Remember how I'm like really good about admitting that I'm wrong? Like, there have been positions that I've taken where I've had people rationally explain why it was hurtful, etc., and I can say HEY I WAS WRONG and be gracious about it?

I THINK I NEED PEOPLE TO STOP FEELING LIKE THEY NEED TO CONSTANTLY NITPICK EVERYTHING I SAY/WRITE/REVIEW. Give me one effing day off, hmm? Flaming_muse? I love your newly coined word, impupedants.

I mean, I REALLY don't see this shit happening anywhere else, in anyone else's journals or websites, or recaps. At least not to the degree that I get it. STOP PLEASE. Just for 24 hours, please?
GAME OF THRONES IS BACK ON MY EYEBALLS. Oh, how I love this show. I'm back recapping them, so come talk to me about how awesome it is! (We're spoiler-free for the books, please remember that. NO SPOILERS, just discuss the episode, okay?)

Huge weekend at the site:
Later today is the next trio of eps for Dexter, MAD MEN and Bomb Girls, so be sure to come back for those.

ION, I finished my monster fic, it's in edits right now, and I might just start posting a chapter a day today, since my unbelievably awesome beta/editor ([livejournal.com profile] flaming_muse) and I are a large portion of the way through it. And it's apparent that I've totally lost my ability to grammar. Derp. Anyway, if not today, then later this week. She has a life to lead on her own. :)

And in other news, who wants to see some pics of the many many things blooming in my garden? Big ol' pics of roses, bluebonnets, etc. )
1. Happy birthday to the lovely [livejournal.com profile] anelith, and I hope that it's a great one. *hugs to my Anne-girl*
2. SOUTHLAND. Are you kidding me with this? I had to pace the floor, it was so intense. (Also, heads up: I go OFF on a particular scene where women are being victimized, and I'm STILL mad about it. Not at the show, it is - as always - an impassioned narrator of life. I'm just mad that it HAPPENS.)
3. I find it more than a little disturbing that Boy Kitty makes a habit of pushing into the bathroom when I'm using it and stares at me with his impassioned gaze. o_0 Porque, pussy gato?
4. Spring is springing! I know it's just getting started, so there is loads of bare space, but I'm happy to see little buds everywhere and flowers popping up already. I'm about to be laden with roses, too. Woot!

Pics of my garden and a fansty bath under the cut )

And lastly, can we talk about how deliciously awesome Logo's 1 Girl 5 Gays is? It's pretty much my most favorite talk show ever.


Feb. 28th, 2012 10:41 am
Last night was a tough one, but not for reasons you'd think. One person seemed like a hopeless case, honestly. That always leaves me frustrated. Here's the recap, with a special emphasis on how important a support group is (and would it matter in the case of someone not giving a damn?)

ION, had a very stressful night, and let me just state for the record that there is NO WAY IN HELL I would ever go back to high school. And man, it sucked when I was there, but now with how fast people shit on each other via social media? How easy it is to be awful because of the (very very thin) veil of anonymity of being online? (And honestly, I think that bleeds into their every day - like, they forget that they can't just say anything they want in RL vs. online life.) Ugh.

Teens? You have my sympathy. My current solution is to get mine off the grid, so to speak. No more FB, none of that stuff. It's too easy to be swept up in things, and with my son's social disorder, it just spells trouble.

Speaking of, I'm a little heart-heavy today, so I'm going to be scarce. Be good to people, okay? (Or don't make a point of being ugly, for crying out loud. Add something nice to the world today.)

Here's my contribution, first flowers of the season )
Man, do I love to travel. Like, if that was a job, professional trip taker, I would be the mo-fo Director of Hell Yes. (I would insist on funky cool titles in said company.)

Before I say anything, though, I want to extend a HUGE THANK YOU to two people for helping me take a vacation: [livejournal.com profile] sheafrotherdon and "lj user="moosesal"> for pinch hitting for me at Hey, Don't Judge Me with recaps for Hoarders and Top Chef, respectively. Please check out the wonderful job they each did. I had not one worry while away, knowing the two of them would do a wonderful job. And hey, lookee there! I WAS RIGHT. :D

And now for something completely different. New York is always wonderful. I mean, duh. New York and San Francisco are my go-to towns where I never have a bad time. Met up with [livejournal.com profile] flaming_muse and had the confirmation that she is in the Tribe of Joseph (where are my Anne Shirley girls? Holler!) I only travel with people that I know I'm going to enjoy in multiple situations, and yep, I was right with her. Not one bad moment, not one awkward pause, and I really could have used another three days with her, I'm just saying.

Day One: The first night/show was Sleep No More. Keep in mind that I'm writing up full reviews for HDJM, so I'm not going into detail here. But I will say.... )

Day Two was the Met, specifically the Egyptian Exhibit with my personal docent, [livejournal.com profile] flaming_muse. I know rudimentary things about Egypt, so it was so fun to have her point out tiny details in carvings, in the type of writing used, etc. So, so fun. Not to mention we talked non-stop about everything under the sun, and were eating delicious foods and in beautiful surroundings. LOVELY.

And then we headed to the Al Hirschfeld Theater for the Darren Criss Experience. Lol. And...well, it was enjoyable to a good degree? But. )

Day Three, or: When Stoney Lost Her Damn Mind At Book of Mormon, The Musical. But first, the Cloisters! )

My flight was delayed by an hour and a half, so I spent a long time at the airport reading and people watching, then had a neighbor on my flight back. RANDOM? BUT NOW: I am getting the shakes from lack of breakfast and racing to type this up, so here I'll stop and divert the rest of my energies into the HDJM reviews of the shows.

IN SUMMATION: GREAT TRIP WAS GREAT. I love my friends. The End.
Whatever, like, three people posted today on LJ. So you get three posts from me today. /UNPRECEDENTED.

So I log trackbacks on Hey, Don't Judge Me, and saw that I'm getting a fair amount of traffic from an LJ comm I didn't know about. And I'm being trolled for being a dickhead about Hoarders! I FEEL LIKE I HAVE ARRIVED, YOU GUYS. LOL at people mad at me for having an opinion they don't like. Sorry? Sorry my life and experiences made me think not just like you?


But it sure is effing things up for others, huh? Massive storm cell that ran from just north of Waco up past OKC almost to Kansas last night. In my area, DFW, there were EIGHT tornadoes. My friends in southwest Dallas had GRAPEFRUIT-SIZED HAIL. That is bigger than a softball, y'all. That'd brain you. My friends in Flower Mound, which is near my in laws, had baseball sized hail. My in laws locked themselves in their bathroom, texted me when it was over. A tornado touched down just north of them by a mile. And my neighborhood, well, the sirens went off, I had the laundry room ready, and we were in there for thirty minutes, waiting for all of them to pass. And they went right around us. I went on my walk this morning and five blocks north of me: a 60 foot high oak tree ripped out of the ground. No rotten limbs, trunk, or roots, just that powerful of a storm. Crazy.

Fun times in the "storm cellar" (aka the laundry room): cats are miserable being trapped in there with the four of us. Smudge decides to take a poop in his litter box (which is kept in the laundry room.) My son is feeding off the nervous energy and won't shut up. Emily is complaining about people "touching her" - child, this is a LAUNDRY ROOM, not a ballroom! Get over it! #2 curled into a ball in my lap, shaking. "Is it over? Is it over? What's that sound!@? Is it over?" Thank goodness my cell phone service was good, I could track the storm as it passed. Also helpful: twitter. Man, I love Twitter. @StoneyboBoney, if you wanna come over to the dark side.

This morning, however, was GLORIOUS. Not a cloud in the sky today. Nothing but sunshine. You can practically hearthe plants growing. I took pics with my phone, so they're not the best, but they're pretty decent. Purdy flowers under here )

I know it's only Wednesday, but I'm living like it's Friday!
Yesterday I went to this great consignment shop with my sister and they had some amazing things like medical anomaly pictures and models of eyeballs and things like that. I took a picture of one that was amazing (it was behind glass, so I couldn't see the other pictures behind it, my hands were full with other things.) I've got that behind a cut by itself because it might be disturbing to someone else, but I'm fascinated with it. (Malformed unborn, for those who need to be warned.)

I think it's amazing and utterly fascinating, personally - some of you may not )

I also found a cool trilobite plaster that looked like it was from a classroom and loads of gorgeous barnacles. Check it - and after that are a bunch of pics from my garden. I like nature - it makes cool stuff. )

I am very ready for the weekend to be here.
So here's what I did today. May I remind you that I am a grown-ass woman. I bought: silver lamè red, cobalt blue, and purple satin, and a Pucci-like print. Not to mention a string of faux pearls, faux fur, and a variety of large "jewels" that are sticky on the back. And pieces of leather, and other fabrics.

Why? To make a wardrobe for toy horses, of course. I MEAN, NATURALLY, RIGHT? [turbans, dressing gowns, smoking jackets, naughty lingerie, peasant vests. FOR HORSE TOYS.] Omg, I should not be this excited. I looked around for a toy pageboy cap (because Skidoodle is Oirish, don' cha ken?) but realized I'm going to have to make one. And while I searched I realized that there is actually a world of women out there that do this stuff UNIRONICALLY. Like, they just enjoy dressing up their toys and COMPETING. Competing.

Not young girls, GROWN WOMEN. I promise I will not turn into that. I promise.

But look at this cad! This bastard! This wealthy playboy that gets what he wants, when he wants it, and right now he wants to force Fancy Face Von Linestock to marry him and give him babies! ahahahahahahahaha )

Oh, Ransom, how many fillies hearts will you break before your lust is ever sated?
MASSIVE PICSPAM. MASSIVE PICS. OF A MASSIVE HOLE IN THE EARTH. (And more!) It all starts with a drive to the airport with a sign that read Captain Sparklepants, complete with glitter effects... ~~~wavy lines of flashback!~~~ )

Aside from making her move here so we can do it all again, that is. :)
Who doesn't love decorating someone else's things, huh? So here's the situation: I have an entry light that I do not like at all. It came with the house, it's not my style, and I am going to be all up with the scaffolding this weekend to hang my dining room chandelier, and thought I'd knock that one out, too. BUT I CANNOT CHOOSE.

My house is a traditional home architecturally, but I lean towards mid-century design, because I like clean lines and random organic shapes. Under the cut is the poll with choices. too many pretties in the world for me to choose from! 4 pics under the cut + a poll )
GUYS. GUYS. Oprah is going to have the polygamist family from Sister Wives on her Thursday show. MUST SEE TV, I believe. You have been warned ahead of time to get those Tivos/DVRs set up.

Also, [livejournal.com profile] tabaqui mentioned that she couldn't find the pics online of what my Halloween costume will be based on, so I have thoughtfully uploaded them and put them under a cut. WARNING: they have some big creep factor, but only one is what could truly be called "grody." <-- scientific terminology, only can be used by Scientists. Or Scienceticians, of which I am one.

If you google "Masters of Horror: Imrpint" [for it was a Showtime TV series] you will get torture pics, not my costume-inspiration. So there's your warning there, too. This particular episode was banned in the US because it's just. that. skeevy. It's mostly the torture scene and all of the other scenes, too. Just those reasons. Lol.

Y'ALL I CANNOT WAIT TO LATEX MY FACE TO LOOK LIKE HER. Creepy pics under the cut, head's up! )

Michaels and Joanns today, hopefully I can find all of the things I'll need for the costume. Kimonos are pretty straight-forward by design, so it's just a matter of finding good fabric. I LOVE HALLOWEEN!

[ETA} She found the vid of the whole movie if you want to watch!
Not dead, nor am I drowned. I did have loads and loads of physical labor this past week while the pool chemistry was balancing out. OH YEAH. BECAUSE THE POOL IS FILLED WITH WATER AND WE SWAM ALL WEEKEND. \o/

Before I did, though, I got a big chunk of the landscaping done, namely the hardscape. Which translates into FOUR TONS OF ROCK moved by yours truly. I have some serious guns right now. But we'll get to that later. Massive picspam coming up, and I'm not even kidding. Like, 40 pictures or something redonk. OK, so remember how my backyard looked like this at the end of July?

Well, now it looks like this.... )

I'm heading to a landscape place to buy some plants and get tacos. HEY GUYS. GUYS. GUESS WHAT I'M GOING TO DO WHEN I'M DONE? If you guessed jump in my mother truckin' pool, YOU ARE CORRECT.
"I know, that was real sweet of you." LOL, Maxine Thortenberry! Some True Blood spoilers at the end, but I got a deck this weekend! 24 yards of cement, which is three truck loads. DAMN. And the crew got it poured, leveled, and lined off of one hour and ten minutes. CRAZY. Also, the Mr. and I built a fence yesterday. You know, like people do.

large # of pool construction pics under the cut )

Now for something completely different. ITS-

TRUE BLOOD: I tell you what, if ever I needed to stress that I really don't care about certain characters - and actually find their story lines distasteful, last night cemented that. HOWEVER. Freaking BANANA PHONE, LOL x forever. True Blood spoilers )

Last, I'm pretty excited that Temple Grandin won so many awards, and how funny was she standing up and waving like she was waving a lasso? Hahahaha. Cute. Okay, now to start digging up crap soil to make way for plants and good soil (I'm not leaving anything to chance, I'm doing this myself.)
First, pool. I have the foundation for the deck! They pour on Monday, then blow in the plaster the next day (I think) and fill it NEXT WEEKEND. My floaties and flippy floppies are waiting. I will not miss all of the dirt and sand that is constantly tracked into the house, though. )

I took my new fun neighbor to the garden center to help her pick out plants. We've been planning on a little outing since our margarita lunch the other day. But I didn't realize she was bringing her 2 year old with her. Note: I have nothing against 2 year olds, having had three of them. But. This is a 100 degree (plus) day, there is nothing of real interest to a 2 year old at a nursery (aside from pulling flowers off of plants, ack) and it's almost nap time. Now, her daughter looooves me. Which is sweet. But I'm hot, she's snotty, and I don't want to hold her in nursery all while pointing out plants to her mom and trying to get a word in around "I-i-i-i-i-i-i want to touch that, Wora." Etc. etc.

If I'm braced for cranky 2 year olds, I'm a-ok. When I'm trying to "work" well... Let's do this again when Daddy's home, mm'kay? That's just not a fun place for a kid, let's be honest. Let's, guys. Let's be honest. Cut the lying. God, I just can't trust any of you, can I?

WHY YES I'M A LITTLE ADDLE PATED BECAUSE OF THE HEAT, WHY DO YOU ASK? OMG, pool in days, just keep thinking there will be a pool in a matter of DAYS.

JERSEY SHORE. Guys, I've not had much to say because it's just so... embarrassing. I'm embarrassed for pretty much all of them. But I do have a few things about last night. Spoil;ers for Jersey Shore )
Not a lot happened over the past few days that you can see, but today is a big one - they're framing out the deck! I'm so close to my resort like backyard I can taste it. Or maybe that's just the pineapple I had for breakfast... )

ION, to quell my headache yesterday I took to my bed with the Sookie Stackhouse books (#3 and #4) to remind myself of all of the stuff that's not on True Blood. And I realized just how reprehensible a character Sookie is. Guys, she's a self-centered, judgmental jerk. It makes me lol. I wrote up a character analysis last night and sent it to Kassie to make her laugh. I might post it, if only to see if anyone else noticed how much abuse the word "mouthwatering" got in that whole series. FIND A NEW WORD, CHARLAINE.

IOOtherN, I've got the outline of a Dr. Reid fic bumbling around, and that's very exciting because I all but given up on ever writing fanfic again, so that's something. To me, at least. :)

I have leftover shredded, roasted pork shoulder that is calling my name. Mmmm, adobo seasoning & chipotles + pork = happy mouf on me. Poor Sally Derg was waiting for her bone [I always save big bones for her] but there is no where for her to nom [that's strictly an outdoor activity] and she is sad faced. She keeps looking at me with a head tilt as I reheat the meat as if to say, "MOM I CAN SMELL IT. Where's mah bone, baroooOoooo!?" Soon, purpy derg, you shall have it for I have wrapped it in plastic and shoved it in the freezer where it awaits your delicate derg lips.

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