HAPPY NEW YEAR! If you're on the other side of the globe from me, at least. If you live where I do, then wait a few hours and read that. IT'LL BE LIKE I'M RIGHT THERE WITH YOU.

I have many things to write about (lol, not really, just me going "HEY GUYS, GUESS WHAT I DID TODAY: LAUNDRY. GUYS, GUYS, GUESS WHAT I DID NOW? DISHES!") but it'll have to wait until the new year. Tonight I am starting up my old tradition of Cards and Booze at my place because for new folks that don't know, I will not drive on NYE. Too many people I've known/worked with hit/killed by drunk drivers.

WHICH LEADS ME TO THIS: GET A CAB TONIGHT. Just do it. Do not drive if you've had booze in your system, no matter how barely buzzed you think you are. 1) you're impaired, 2) you'll be on the road with other impaired people who think just like you, and 3) cabs leave your mouth and hands free for back seat make outs, there is no bad there! HAPPY NEW YEAR INDEED. :)

I'm introducing my neighbors to my family's card game (other people might play it, too, this is what we play in our family, and how we play it, so I don't need to hear how you do it differently, you'll just confuse me) and have printed up a rule card and laminated it and have a deck of cards for them to take home as party favors because I am the hostess with the mostest. Lol. We're also have duck sliders (yay hunting season! I can have red meat again! Yes, duck isn't red meat, technically, quit riding me, you get my point) and salmon crudities and champagne punch and goat cheese and homemade crackers and a bundt cake and GENERAL FUN TIMES.

Hands and Feet, the most awesome card game without money or stripping that exists )

BE SAFE! HAVE FUN! ENJOY THE CALENDAR WIPE! Let's all step it up in 2011 and quit the slacking shit of 2010, shall we? Ha. BE SAFE! BE WELL! BE HAPPY! Imagine I'm hugging you and giving you a loving bump on the shoulder!

<3 <3 <3
Come talk to me! Spoilers and pretty much nothing but, so you have been warned, you Eskimo that lives in the tundra therefore the only person left who hasn't seen the movie yet. )

And I'll be seeing this one again. And again. GORGEOUS MOVIE. [In other news that I will post about tomorrow, I have witnessed my first Gun Show up close and personal. We really need a plague of zombies to thin the herd. Thankfully I just bought a handy dandy flint and steel fire starter that even starts a fire IN THE RAIN. Take that, diseased hordes!!) Lol.
I got an audition call last night for a part so awesome, it might as well be ret-conned into Raising Arizona. THAT AWESOME. (Very small part, one scene, but one of those "Son? You got a panty on your head." kind of scenes.) OH MY GOD, WANT WANT WANT. I just need to hire a videographer to film my audition and then sacrifice a goat. *crosses everything, except Ts, and they know why. Bastards.)

But you came here for the apocalypse talk, let's be honest. There's a "get to know me!" meme going around, and one of the questions is "which is worse, zombie or robot apocalypse" and I'm like "REALLY? THIS IS UP FOR QUESTIONING?" If you answered robots, then you have not watched enough movies.

1. 28 Days Later (I KNOW. THEY AREN'T ZOMBIES. BUT IT WOULD BE THE SAME.) vs. Terminator? One movie has everyone EATING EVERYONE ELSE and the other has the Governor of California stalking a chick with acid washed pants tucked into puffy socks. (Note: T and T2 are some of my all time fave movies, just to be fair.)

2. Braaaaaaaaaaaaaaains! vs. "We used poisonous gasses and we poisoned their asses" although that last one does mean no more yogurt and stairs. STILL. DOES NOT COMPARE.

3. Camping out in a mall with a few douchenozzles (and a secretly pregnant zombie lady that will kill you all) as hordes of hungry zombies surround you looking for a way to eat you vs. "we are in Zion" rave of perfectly beautiful people all of the same age and all are very very sweaty. HOWEVER: you have to endure the monotone of Neo in that last one. DOES NOT COMPARE.

4. Having to off your mum after she JUST MET the love of your life (who has dumped you, let's be honest) while you're leading a group to safety at the Winchester through a zombie horde in hopes of a mythic loaded gun vs. DO YOU WANT TO PLAY A GAME? DOES NOT COMPARE. (The computer didn't launch the nukes, so.... Tic Tac Toe destroyed the threat. THINK ABOUT THAT FOR A MINUTE. TIC. TAC. freaking TOE.)

And if you can't figure out which movie is which, I AM NOT GOING TO HELP YOU. That is an education you must reach for on your own, Grasshopper. Robots will kill your computer and car, you can live in the woods or an island, and quite happily. Or you know, in a magnet factory (my first line of defense.) Zombies will EAT your FACE MEAT. Being eaten is far worse than being denied ICanHazCheeseburger or having to play a game of computer chess, I'm just saying.

(And think about my icon: robots will destroy the sign THAT WARNS YOU ABOUT ZOMBIES.)
1. I would like to send a public shout out to my FIL who ran his third marathon yesterday (in 47 degree wet weather) in 4:32. The man is 73, and took up long distance running four years ago. Cancer survivor, salute! *beams*
2. I would like to state that while it's awesome he is so fit, sitting in crappy weather for hours listening to "Who Let The Dogs Out" is the very definition of hell. (Even though I love love LOVE cheering runners/wheelchair racers on) - I have the sniffles and would like more coffee and wool socksies on my toesies, thx.
3. I am not doing anything today, because I am cantankerous, so I meme! (which I never NEVER do, for any newcomers.) Yoinked from like, everyone on my flist.

I'll be all thoughtful and stick it under here, too. (It's the ask me questions about my fandom meme) )
And it's a mark of my age to note that I hear that subject line in a broken computer voice, then follow it up with "Global Thermonuclear War." (Oh!! And happy birthday to [livejournal.com profile] ponders_life!!)

I'm full o' beans today and want y'all to PLAY and HAVE FUN WITH ME. There's been entirely too much griping and silence, yes? Yes. So here's how it works:

1. Make up a quotation.
2. Make up someone famous who said it.
3. Make it funny. (Or ironic. Or ridiculous.)

Here's mine:

"I've got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one."
~Oscar Wilde

"No, really. Frank Bacon - I call him Frank - wrote all of my plays. I'm, uh, not as talented as everyone thought. Whoops!"
~William Shakespeare

"What I find most interesting about Quantum Physics is how at the subatomic level, those particles, say, quarks, for example, can be in two places at once. Or, not exist at all! It's mind boggling. Also, I hope to finish my doctorate in one year.
~Paris Hilton

[ETA]MOAR:

"I could fucking murder someone for a steak."
~Mahatma Ghandi

"Did you hear something?"
~Helen Keller

"A little club soda will get that out."
~King of Denmark to his wife, Lady Macbeth.

Either comment here, or put this in your own journal and comment with a link so I can laugh with you. YAY FRIDAY!

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