Monday Blatherings

[stoney321]

1. I am still unable to walk. My knee surgeon is officially a liar. "You'll be off crutches in 36 hours!" he said. "You'll be faster than gazelles in heat!" he said. "You'll make cool wahwahwahwah noises as you jump over 20 foot security fences!" he said. I am hopping on one leg (crutches have bruised my pitts) and flopping about on the bed trying to not take pain pills. My knee makes NO BIONIC NOISES. :(


2. The good thing is the book I'm almost finished with: WORLD WAR Z. The greatest novel about the zombie apocalypse ever written EVER. I want all zombies all the time. Like, I would totally love to fight an army of zombies. I would kick butt. That's the great thing about growing up in a cultish religion: we had apocalypse training every summer! (Um, I'm not joking.) I could whip up a desalinization kit, get my 2 year supply of food and fuel, my .22, blow out the staircases (zombies can't climb stairs) and live to see a brighter day. WHO'S WITH ME?!


3. Like... wouldn't a zombie-centric ficathon be fun? You know, any fandom, or original fic, but there has to be zombies in it? I'm in like Flynn on that one.


4. Something you may not have read about the YFZ Ranch, but I did because I read the members' blogs (why aren't the authorities??) 10 of the 18 girls in official state custody, ages 10 - 14, are pregnant, and two of them with their second child. The first person that says "give these people their religious freedom" gets my feminist foot up their backside so deep you'll be reading "Saucony" on the roof of their mouth.


5. AFI wrapped last night and while we didn't win any awards (aww) the director of my second movie St. Nick did for his GORGEOUS short, A Catalog of Anticipations. Yay!


6. My camera is in another room, and I haven't uploaded any pics from Wed. red carpet, so you'll have to wait, those of you interested. I'm going to drag myself to a horizontal surface and read more zombies.

Okay, what would you do to survive a zombie attack? Go! (Do you need me to give you a starting scenario? I will - just ask in comments.)

[ETA!!!] UM - Please notice this man's name, the man that berated SLC for not having a Zombie Plan!! WESLEY DID NOT DIE IN NFA, evidently! Best April Fool's Joke EVER!!

Comments

[tabaqui]

Oh, man - number four? That makes me sick to my stomach. I heard a *very* tiny bit about that place on the news like - last week, but nothing since. Just...fuck.


And okay - to survive the zombie apocalypse...oh gods, zombies creep me out. Are they the ones like from 28 Days After who can run really fast or like the ones from Dawn of the Dead who sort of shuffle?

I would - be in a fast car. Have flame thrower/torches/some kind of fire. Molotov cocktails. I would also have machete and shotgun with lots of shells - beheadings for all!

And omfg, i would have Sam'n'Dean to help me.
:)

Oh and! I'm glad the surgery is over but booo to not making bionic noises!
*pet pet pet*

[redbrickrose.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry your knee isn't doing better. :(

Isn't WWZ awesome? A zombie-centric ficathon would be the MOST FANTASTIC THING EVER. I would totally be in.

[drusplace.livejournal.com]

I hope your knee is all better soon. Bionic noises would have been totally cool!

To survive a zombie attack? I'd play turtle. Then they'd all shuffle past me cause zombies aren't too bright. Or they'd figure out my ruse and I'd be zombie-fied!

[globalfruitbat.livejournal.com]

I completely have a plan for the Zombiepocalpyse!

I'm living in the rather hippie-ish neighbour of my city, and this has given me two (2) options to choose from for the best base of operations to survive the Zombiepocalypse.

a) There is a grocery store not too far from here -- maybe six blocks -- that conveniently already has most of its windows boarded up! So I could protect myself and others during the dangerous times, and have fuel for my body for when I need to go out and BASH HEADS.

The windows are just glass with boards on them, though, which is not as secure as

b) There is a high school just up the street that is an awesome old building. Lots and lots of movies have been filmed in it -- both Scream AND Scary Movie! It is made of stone, and while there are ground floor windows, it would be easy to barricade them because this school has TONNES of trades technology classrooms! (My boyfriend, who was a joiner for three years right out of high school, and who is now doing a Fine Furniture program at the college, before he goes on to become a trades teacher himself, went there.) There is a lot of material for weaponry, as well as lots of hidey holes to hide away in.

And a big ol' field for a cast-of-thousands final battle.

[southernbangel.livejournal.com]

I would run and hide like the pussy I am if under a zombie attack.

You know, I bet we could have the surgeon implant a chip in it that will make the bionic noises when you run.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Isn't that horrible, about those kids? I've been seeing red everytime I've read an editorial on various online newspapers wondering why we're wasting time on this "religious" issue. Bastards.

If I may get sniffy, the creatures in 28 Days Later had a rage virus, they were not the walking undead. So, the later. Shuffling, reanimated tissue.

Having those two on your team seems VERY WISE. I worry about you choosing a car: what if the zombies take over and you can no longer get gas? Oooh! Biodesiel, hello! :D Machete = best weapon choice. Easier to take off a head than a head shot with a shotgun. Hahaha.

(And thank you!)

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Waaah, me too! The swelling isn't so scary bad like before, which is good. (Did you see the Grindhouse production of "Planet Terror?" When they cut to Bruce Willis and his face is all huge and gross and pulsing? Okay, it wasn't like that. But it made me THINK of that. :D)

Let's have that ficathon, dammit!! Who would you write?

[jgracio.livejournal.com]

1. :(

2. Why the apocalypse training? Wouldn't the Rapture or whatever it's called
save all the good religious folk?

4. You know, has anyone tried to have a religion based on not paying taxes? Would that work? Or would the government suddenly decide some freedoms are too much?

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I've decided to just "make" bionic noises to raise my morale. Hahaha.

Okay, if that's your game plan, I'm altering mine. I'm going to stick close to you, so that when you go turtle, they'll focus on you and I'll be able to make a better getaway. :D HEY. It's all about survival at this point, missy!! :D

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Can I say that I'm nodding in approval at your FIRST LINE. Good girl. Okay. *finishes reading*

Awesome locale - if those windows weren't boarded up, though, it's DEATH TRAP. (Is there a flat roof, and can you get on top? Best position to monitor the zombie hordes.)

The school seems a better option: stone walls. Also, all that metal can be turned into machetes, double sided axes, broadsoards... I like it. Make sure you have access to food and fresh water, though, zomg!!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

WRong answer, Lee! WRONG ANSWER. You go to Maren's - her landscape offers the best protection. Plus, barricade the garage and the door leading into her house, then blow out the stairs to the front door and I don't see why you couldn't live through this thing! At least, you could make it until I showed up in a modded HumVee with air support on the way!

Hahahaha - let's look into that!!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

1. I know!! *cuddles that frowny face for better morale!*
2. Haha, see, the Mormons don't believe in the Rapture; they believe there will be a big final battle they'll have to fight and win, and it will take a long time, so they have to be prepared, hence the 2 year supply of food and fuel the members are encouraged to have. (Um, I still have a 6 month supply, because it just makes sense!!) <-- hee!

4. I love that religion. Let's start it up! You can be the Grand Poobah, or whatever. I'll play the piano.

[beadattitude.livejournal.com]

Sweetie, why are you trying not to take pain pills? It's not a moral failing if you NEED them.

World War Z was awesome.

It would take a while, maybe, to get zombies out here in the country. So hopefully we'd have a little time. First thing I'd do is secure all the windows and doors with plywood we'd have left over from the renovation from hell. Then I'd run down to the Lamson & Goodnow outlet and get some big damn knives while J borrowed a gun and some shells from his hunting editor.

Then we'd lay in a bunch of food and create fallback positions in case the zombies get in and would probably invite Jeff's bro,his wife and baby over, and maybe R could rig up some booby traps with his saw blades.

We'd remove the new wooden steps at the back and side entrances hoping they'd be too stupid to climb, and set up barricades/booby traps at the front door. God, that new French door we put in is certainly a liability. ::ponders::

Yeah, I might have been able to pull that together a little too quickly. Not that I have a THING about zombies, noooooo. :;curls up tightly:: Nooo.

[knotted-rose.livejournal.com]

World War Z is one of my favorite books of all time. I'm not so much into zombies. That book impressed me because it's the most realistic fiction book I've read in a long time. I *completely* believed every country's reaction to the zombies.

As for me, I've thought about this, during and after reading the book. First off, I'd hook up with my Qigong instructor, who's been doing martial arts for 30 years and knows more than one sword form. I think we'd try to get other people from our class together as well, as well as my friends from just up the street who both have more than one blackbelt. I don't know if we'd stay in Seattle. I'm not convinced that we'd be able to grow enough food, though there's plenty of fresh water. If we did stay, there's an apartment building just up the street that has no street level apartments, has 5 stories, and is right across the street from the grocery store. It also has balconies and a flat roof. Could survive there for quite some time.

As for a ficathon -- the fandom I'm most active in at this point is Numb3rs. Could see Charlie (the mathematician) freaking out at the exponential rate the zombies are multiplying. Megan would give modified Krav Maga lessons, for taking down zombies. All of the agents would retrain for headshots. And they'd probably hire themselves out as protection teams. They'd have more amo than most, being FBI agents. . .

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Argh, I don't like dependency on pills. Not to mention that when you don't feel the pain, you over extend (like I did Thursday night) and cause more damage, so... (I take them to sleep.)

I like the booby traps idea! Especially if they're bear traps. (Make a map of where they are so you don't fall prey to their bear-trapping technology of PAIN.)

Get some water purification pills while you're at it - you live where you can collect fresh rainwater. And seeds! Collect garden seeds! *draws up contingency plans for us all!!*

[beadattitude.livejournal.com]

OMG the RANCH. ::cries:: ::Wonders if maybe these guys are zombies and if we should take them out::

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Isn't that what made that book so great was how well thought out each country's reaction was? Man, I can see that book being a kick-ass series on HBO. I want each little vignette to be an episode.

See, I love that you know SWORDS are the key. Head lopping, people! (Head shots with a gun are nigh on impossible from anyone not a sniper.)

What about access to greenhouses? You could grow veggies hydroponically. (But what about meat? Chickens are the easiest.) The apartment building sounds GOLDEN. If you can retract the stairs, that is IDEAL.

(I loved the houses on stilts in South Dakota in the book. Genius!)

We really need to make this a multi-fandom ficathon, huh?

[tabaqui]

Oh, that's right! But...did they die if you just shot 'em in the torso? I don't remember, damnit! :)

It's easy to siphon gas from other cars and from gas station tanks - we'd be okay!

And yes, exactly - it's not a fucking 'religious' issues - it's called child abuse and *rape*, for fuck's sake.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

WE SHOULD TAKE THEM OUT!! (And check the children for infestation.)

[beadattitude.livejournal.com]

Oh, I hear you, having done that many many times, but absolutely not moving is not a good thing either, not for healing up from surgery. Have you tried rotating tylenol and ibuprofin? Ice and heat? Jabbing your nail right at the top of the pad of your thumb, about 1/16 from where your nail is? It's an accupuncture move for pain. Hurts like a mofo, but it'll help!

Do something. I'm not being all peer pressurey, but you shouldn't have to be in pain. You're probably tensing up all around that joint and are going to get all out of whack and stuff.

<---- zombie food

[marenfic.livejournal.com]

We could go to the top floor and blow out the inside stairs too. We will have full arial view of the neighborhood from my hilltop vantage point.

But if zombies can't climb stairs, couldn't I just put the dog gate up? Hahahahaha! The very idea gives me uncontrollable giggles. Zombies stopped by a dog gate.

Would a baseball bat be helpful? Or must it have a sharp edge? Oh! How about the chainsaw attachment to the weed wacker? You wouldn't even have to get that close.

I am woefully under-informed. I fear for my ability to survive until you show up.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

They only died in head shots, I believe. I'll have to research (aka: watch the movie again.) *G*

But let's look at this logistically. (Har har) If there's a world-wide release of zombies, we'll run out of gas. If not from people hording it, then from the fires that will inevitably erupt from people fighting over taking it from other people. Not to mention that oil tankers will most likely carry zombies, which will take out the crew, and we'll have oil spills every where. Which means: no oil for you and me. Battery powered mopeds are where I'm going. Just... be careful out there. (Heeee!)

AND YES. I don't get why people don't GET that!?!?! I'm so glad you've seen through the BS from the beginning. SHeesh, people!!

[redbrickrose.livejournal.com]

I'm . . . not sure I could write anything but bandom these days, so I don't know for sure. But ZOMBIES. I would totally come up with something.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I love you. And hahaha, the dog gate is akin to the pantry door for aliens, yes? :D

Seriously, your house is the PERFECT HOME to withstand a zombie horde. Not to mention we could train Truman to sniff out infected people. And then yes, the baseball bat would come in handy. *bashes brains in*

I'm thinking a weapon of choice would be a tree-limb lopper. Stretches out to 30 feet, a pull on a cord and LOP. No more zombie biting head.

I WILL SAVE YOU. I will also have my Surviving a Zombie Attack Guide to help train you, the Mr., and Lee. (Because she'll come.) Let's get a veggie patch growing on your top deck for security.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Today is better than this weekend was. My knee was ll jacked up and more swollen two days after surgery, but that was because I believed the whole "I'll be fine in 36 hours" bull honky.

I go see the doc tomorrow for a check up, which is good. (And I spent most of my high school years on crutches because of my knees and ankles, so I'm an old hand at ice pads/elevation/pain meds. I just don't want to be immobile any more - I'm an active gal on the go! hahaha.)