Halfway through my 5 mile run this morning my music went off and a call came through. It was about my son, who had collapsed in the bathroom and had been found by a teacher. Paramedics were called, I ran like the freaking wind to the house, got in the car and drove straight to him at the school, turned down the opportunity to pay a million bucks have a ride to the ER and drove him myself (it's a mile from the school), and had to almost carry my 6'1", 180 pound son into the ER.

After hours of tests - full battery of them - the conclusion is: they don't know. Could be low blood sugar, even though his wasn't really low. Could be low blood pressure, but his wasn't really low. Could be his medicines, who knows. Awesome. (And it doesn't matter, because jfc it is my child and I don't CARE about my looks, but I spent all day smelling like an armpit, sweaty and nasty in my workout clothes and I tried to give myself a wee sponge bath with antiseptic wipes because I was mortified that I had been working out and felt disgusting.)

He's home, fine, eating everything that isn't tied down and now I get to do my adrenaline dump after keeping it cool all damn day so HE wouldn't lose it. There was a massive car wreck that had the ER filled, and it was nerve-wracking sitting in our room and watching Care Flight stretchers race by and hear people crying and yelling in pain. UGH. :(

Tonight for Halloween I'm going as a frazzled mom who needs a drink. WAIT. A SLUTTY frazzled mom who needs a drink. There, now I'm keeping in tradition.

and I'm really unhappy that I posted about this on FB and only ONE FRIEND had anything sympathetic to say, thank you [livejournal.com profile] crazydiamondsue and everyone else made the equivalent of dick jokes. YEAH, I KNOW I GO FOR THE FUNNY, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT THINGS GET SERIOUS IN MY LIFE, FFS. I have FAMILY that was actively online at the time. Pah.
I'm all out. (If you get that reference, you're old. Hey, I am, too.)

I decided that I deserve nice things recently and planned a birthday party for myself. (I typically don't do anything for my birthday because my daughter's b-day is the day before mine. She should have the attention. Plus, that's a lot of cake.) So I'm throwing one for myself a week early and have some of my dearest friends coming to help me float in the pool, eat delicious food, drink delicious wine, and talk fandom/random all weekend. (I'm kicking the family out to go camping or whatever.)

In preparation, I've spent the past week scrubbing the house from stem to stern, not to mention getting my butt out in the garden to finish some huge projects that are taking me forever to get done.

Well...the garden isn't going to be done. It's 100F (40C) all week, was close to that last week, and I give up. I was sweating so hard the other day that my kids thought I poured water all over myself. GROSS. The kids decided to tear the wallpaper off their bathroom, so I spent all yesterday finishing stripping that off with them, then prepping the plaster and painting it. (Which meant taking the toilet out, faucets, etc.) HEY, DIDN'T PLAN ON THAT TASK. But it's done? And will look nice for my guests? Gah.

It's hard for me to not have everything looking perfect. I was raised to be perfect. Not strive for perfection, but to BE perfect. Vacuum tracks in the carpet, everything spic-and-span, I'm a Master Gardener, so it better LOOK like I am and...I have kids. It ain't spic-and-span. (And these are my dear friends, they won't judge, I know that intellectually, but my mother's voice still creeps in and it's hard.)

Example: my son was talking to me last week while I was styling my hair in the bathroom, and he pulled the towel bar right out of the wall because he was leaning on it. So I had to patch those holes this weekend. Will those patches get repainted in time? ...probably not. And I am having to tell myself it's going to be okay.

I JUST FIGURED OUT THE SOLUTION: get everyone too drunk to look too closely! Okay, this can work. Ha. *blows bangs out of face*

:(

Jun. 14th, 2013 11:45 am
Today is not a good day. It's kind of a culmination of several bad days weeks months in a row. Feeling isolated and lonely and without options is just about the suckiest thing to suck, and all of my close girlfriends (the ones I don't have to explain myself to, don't have to filter myself to) live in other states. That makes me feel trapped like whoa. Random blah about whine whine people blah )

Everyone in the family is gone for the weekend, which should make me happy because hey! Quiet house to myself, that's a rarity! Except I have no desire to write (what I would normally do in this situation) because quite honestly, no one gives a shit about the stuff I'm writing (I can't even get trusted FAMILY MEMBERS to read some of the things I'm working on and tell me anything about it - even that it sucks. They just...won't read it.), which makes it very hard to care about it myself. Wah, wah, poor white girl with a roof over her head, I know. I make myself eyeroll, too, and this is not the journal you signed up for.

Pleh. It's just one of those "why bother? With anything?" sort of days, but I seem to be having them a LOT lately.

ION, I plan on making this for my dinner because no one will eat them before I get a chance to. If avocado fries can't cheer me up...

UGH I GROSS MYSELF OUT SORRY.

Maybe I should create an alter-ego and fight crime. Or turn tricks. Or turn tricks while fighting crime. It's good to be ambitious, I hear? =P

/insert OMG do I try gold star
Planned for the day:
  • get everyone off to school
  • work out
  • clean up, head to appointment
  • revise, edit, etc.
  • lunch
  • drive three towns over to specialty dentist (ugh)
  • drive back, collect husband and son for weekly therapy
  • back home
  • edit, revise, etc.
  • dinner
  • sleep

Actual plans for the day:
  • get everyone off to school
  • start to work out
  • field call for sick child
  • get text from other child that left important item at home
  • drive four towns over (in opposite direction) to get sick child
  • send husband on appointment
  • get Gatorade for sick child
  • figure out how to get important item to other child
  • [ETA] rescue boy kitty from hailstorm outside
  • put Neosporin on claw marks on chest and arms
  • wolf down lunch
  • drive three towns over to specialty dentist (ugh)
  • drive back, collect husband and son for weekly therapy
  • back home
  • make sure sick child doesn't infect other family members
  • get legal issues ironed out today
  • deal with potential fall out from therapy session
  • pick up other child from appointment since her ride is out sick
  • crawl into closet
  • dream of being an empty nester
  • make everyone get their own dinner

To paraphrase Airplane!, "Looks like I picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue. And to start posting that Sterek body-swap fic." Ugh, I'm a dummy. A tired, frazzled dummy.
PREMEPTIVE REPLY TO ANYONE THAT WANTS SOMETHING FROM ME:
...my past several days.

Bad: #2 had a "baby" this weekend (electronic doll) and her stress was my stress, because baby crying noise = me going bananas. But I couldn't make it stop, because it was her grade. And she would burst into tears when the crying would graduate to screaming. Once she picked it up too quickly at 3am (Sat.) and it SHRIEKED because it has a "baby shake" sensor. She was sobbing, "I'm sorry, oh I'm so sorry!" and it was just... D:
Good: That is seriously the best form of birth control there is.
Bad: We still cannot find the a-holes that attacked my son and his boyfriend.
Good: He has friends that are stepping up and supporting them, and are representing conscientious Christians in a lovely manner
Bad: The Mr. left his wallet before leaving for Chicago this week.
Good: He had his passport so he could get on the plane
Bad: He had no credit cards to check into the hotel, etc.
Good: FedEx is freaking amazing.
Bad:I haven't had a proper night's sleep in days.
Good: Because I've been working like a fiend to produce not one but TWO new TV programs, one of which I will be the host of, and the DIY Network is already in talks to purchase said show. And we've not filmed a minute of it yet. :D (The other is an amazing children's show that has the potential to be the next Yo Gabba Gabba, and I'm not even kidding.)
Bad: It's a LOT of work. Calls. Writing. Scheduling. Herding cats. [livejournal.com profile] dovil? There just might be an assistant's position open if I can get these babies off the ground. Plus: booze.

(Throw in the mix all of the chauffeuring I do, meals, cleaning, enforcing rules, enforcing studying/homework, dealing with surly teenagers while my husband is gone, a cat that got out, a cat that was found, a cat that got a scolding and cuddles, and a huge whining dog - because she could NOT stand the noises the robot baby made - and you come close to how my life has been since Friday night.)

HEY I AM GOING ON VACATION NEXT WEEK AND I CANNOT WAIT. Holy smokes, do I need a break.

Also, at HDJM there is new Boardwalk Empire, Dexter, Hoarders, and Teen Wolf waiting for you. THANK YOU for all of the likes, +1s, tweeting, linking and tumbling you're doing! I can see all of that, and I am so grateful to those of you supporting the site! <3
GLEE. (Shut up, I don't judge you for YOUR fannish loves, and I still love this show.) I AM IN A FIGHT WITH THE SHOW, THOUGH.

Guys. GUYS. The recap is here, and I try to make SENSE of that one particular issue (not saying for those of you that haven't watched it yet) and just - come talk to me about it. No ugliness, okay? Let's try and figure things out.

:(

I think there were some amazing moments in that ep, I really do. And I think that Ryan Murphy is stretched too thin and didn't give us ALL THE WORDS.

Booze, cheese, and sad movies are in store for me tonight. I feel like Joey staring at the rain screen. (lol)

FOR NON-GLEE READING, There is also TORCHWOOD and SUPERNATURAL on HDJM.
But I should mention that "it" is not real. It only lives in my paranoid thoughts.

So, for the past, oh, two weeks I've been sneezing. I don't really do that, normally. I'm pretty healthy - hearty and hale, that's me! And when I say sneezing, I mean my kids counted me sneezing 12 times in a row, I caught my breath, and then I went off again another 12 times. Lather, rinse, repeat. Nothing I do helps, no nasal spray, neti pots, shoving crayons up there, nada. (And I have nothing new in my house to be an allergen; it must be something outside, IDK and MOVING ON.)

This morning I read on GAWKER that some poor woman went to the doctor for an itchy ear and there was a spider living in her ear canal oh dear god flame the side of her face and save her soul. Pretty much my worst nightmare. Well, my worst nightmare is a grasshopper handing on my face and stabbing my eyeball with its disgusting pointed foot.

AND NOW ALL I CAN THINK OF IS THAT I HAVE SINUS GNATS. Like, you know when you walk through a cloud of midges and snort sharply through your nostrils to make sure they don't fly up there? WHAT IF I DIDN'T DO THAT ENOUGH AND NOW THEY ARE LIVING IN MY FACE.

If this is true, I will allow the doctors to submerge my body into a lake of lava face first, because I am not coming back from that emotionally sound, you feel me?
Which is a switch, since it's usually my son that is. BUT THIS HAS BEEN ME ALL DAY:



(the huffing and puffing and eye rolling. I'm not putting food on the floor.)

And now I want to watch that movie again if only to see Chris Meloni in a goatee and no pants.) <-- ALWAYS THE RIGHT ANSWER
I owe a few emails, but they're coming. (Owe. Pfft. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, those of you with whom I correspond with on a regular basis.)

  • It was 108 yesterday. I worked in the yard until a headache hit and then I realized that's a sign that death could come and I went inside like a smart person.

  • I am still not finished with the de-Bermuda project from hell. I am so close that it makes me fussy.

  • I think "fussy" is a hilarious word. [an hilarious? It's a good word.]

  • Alcide's butt and other bits were clearly visible on True Blood. I may have had tears spring to my eyes from the beauty of it. And watched that scene twice more.

  • Sam's recap pretty much sums up everything I feel about TB.

  • I am still behind on Breaking Bad, but Melody's recap is up early, which means it was a bad ass episode that had to be talked about ASAP.

  • Oh, and my husband accidentally deleted my Skyrim profile on our PS3. (I only had one save, because it's never been a problem before? And I hate clutter even in electronic form?) SO HA HA THE JOKE IS ON ME except for how I was D: instead of laughing because I was at Level 45 and was just about to have the perk of putting TWO magical charms on armor. On my Daedric Armor that starts off at a rating of 183. /nerd

  • I am still sad face about it.

  • To his credit, he was horrified.

  • I want to stop writing my current story and rewrite Lavern & Shirley as Kurt and Rachel (with Jacob Ben Israel as Squiggy. IDK who could be Lenny, tho. Maybe Mr. Schue? LOL.)



OH! And [livejournal.com profile] flaming_muse's amazing Klaine story hits a pivotal place today, and is uh-may-zing. Really. REALLY.
I had to say goodbye to someone very important to me last night. It's so hard to say goodbye )

ION, I decided yesterday that there is NO WAY I would put a Forum on HDJM. People just can't help themselves and turn into pedants and a-holes too quickly, and I am determined to keep HDJM a place of fun and smiles. I mean... there's an entire internet full of places to bitch about things, right? So. *hands*

Also, I've been beta reading [livejournal.com profile] flaming_muse's latest fic and I get CHILLS thinking about how wonderful it is. And it's not even finished yet. Oh, is it going to be a treat.

Finally, a website I subscribe to sent me a cocktail recipe that I am dying to try out (and play with.)

The Redefined Daisy

1 1/2 oz base spirit (gin, tequila, rum, vodka)
3/4 oz cointreau OR elderflower liqueur (I'm seeing this everywhere. I approve)
3/4 oz fresh lemon juice (1 medium lemon)
2 barspoons of grenadine or raspberry syrup (that would be awesome with the cointreau)
soda water
fresh mint and raspberries for garnish.

Ice cubes in a shaker with first 4 ingredients, shake well, pour in glass, top with soda, swirl, and put in garnish. NOM. Hello, poolside delight. (My choices would be silver tequila, cointreau and raspberry syrup. Which...makes it almost a margarita, I know. But lemon isn't the same as lime. And I might swap out the soda water with mineral water. In fact, that's pretty much how I'm going to make one this weekend. O_O YAY PLANS.) :D

Other combo I'd use: light rum, elderflower liqueur, grenadine. And mineral water. I just don't want the calories, one, and I don't want the acerbic taste of soda water, typically.

Random

Feb. 21st, 2012 09:36 am
I woke up this morning to a cat on my neck (wakeupwakeupfeedmewakeup) and to no coffee. NO. COFFEE. I put the Mr. in charge of getting Emily out to school (even though he was headed for the airport shortly) as I threw on a sweatshirt over my pajamas, pulled on socks, wedged a space between my toes and slipped on some flip flops. (I keep a pair by the door for emergency trips outside with garbage, etc.)

What I'm telling you is that I looked classy. Oh, and I had a clip to hold my rat's nest hair back. Purdy. (Jellis?) I get to Starbucks (I was desperate, they're a mile up the road) hand them my coffee mug (travel mug with Walt from Breaking Bad on it) and find the whole crew standing around looking at it and saying how cool it is. Well, yeah. ;) Fortunately I made business cards (the banner on HDJM, basically) and slid one over, telling them they could go there and buy one for themselves. (Psst: you can, too.)

GOOD MORNING. *bird song*

ION, the Hoarders episode last night almost pushed me to the edge, gang. I had to seriously think about whether or not I'd continue to promote the program on HDJM. Here's the recap where I explain why (and have plenty of warnings for sensitive people.) I had to walk away and have a good cry at one point, ngl.

TONIGHT: Glee! Southland! Stuff!

ETA Oh, and we've added SMASH to our line up on HDJM. HOORAY!
-given the sounds and moans from my house. And they're all from me.
Dear.
God.
I've been infected. SAVE YOURSELVES!!! D:

Cooked for 20 hours straight (that's only a slight exaggeration) including more than two dozen beef short ribs (soaked in Cote du Rhone then browned in bacon fat and herbs) that I had specially cut for Chrimbus Dinner only to be told an hour before dinner was served that my father, step-mom, and siblings wouldn't be coming after all. ARE. YOU. EFFING. ...what!? My awesome lovely favorite sister and her husband were over and asked if my dad told me. Oh, they have the sniffles, you see. Guys, I have been functioning on base human motor skills for two weeks with this damn sinus infection (anti-biotics failed. I have to go back to the doc today/tomorrow) and they have a tickle in their throat? NO SIR. EAT MY FOOD, OPEN THE GIFTS I LOVINGLY BOUGHT FOR YOU AND TELL ME YOU LOVE ME. Every family has their traditions, mine involve disappointment.

So basically I bullied my family into letting me love them, and it worked. They left shortly after dinner, which was fine, because I went to bed at 6:30pm and I just woke up. It's 11:30am as of my typing this. The lurgy is strong, cry cry.

Other than that, the holiday was lovely, the chirrens were well pleased with Giftmas, the Mr. was overjoyed with his thoughtful presents, and I was, too. I owe emails and comments and a few phone calls, but guys, I am going back to bed with my Kindle and reading The Road because I like cheering stories (lol.) (OH!! GUYS!! I MADE MY MOTHER IN LAW CACKLE WITH LAUGHTER ON CHRIMBUS EVE. I felt like a GOD.)

Those of you who feel so inclined to promote your Yuletide stories of awesome, keep it up. I have Calibre open and plan on loading up my Kindle for the week. YAY STORIES.

Oh, and I've had a few PMs asking - yes, I'm going to put up a "Year in Fic" post + a kinda-sorta masterlist. Eventually. But if I start moaning brains, you know the drill - exterminate and save yourselves. *shuffles feet aimlessly*

(I hope everyone had a lovely Hanukkah, Christmas, Giftmas, Sunday, Day of Sacrifice or whatever winter festivus you celebrate. GERMY KISSES FOR EVERYONE! :*)
Or both. There's a slim chance it's both. Look, I'm a middle child that grew up without praise, I have to praise myself. There's a dirty joke in there, I just don't have the energy to find it.

HOW IT IS ALMOST CHRISTMAS. Also, why am I stressed since I am not a Christian? Oh, right, because we celebrate Gift-mas. I HAVE to be productive today with more than just writing. So. Antibiotics today, ordering the last of the presents (come on, Amazon!) and then spending the midday with my sister shopping for foods and something for my dad, one of the most difficult people to please. (See: grew up sans praise.)

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills last night - I have figured out that they are what 90210 WISHED it was back in the day. The recap is up (went up last night, see: I have accomplished naught but my writing) and here's an excerpt:

They are so high school, it’s ridiculous. Paul and Adrienne are the couple that has been dating all four years, were the first to Do It, break up every few weeks, but are always together. Lisa is the awesome rich and popular girl (dating the older guy) that floats through most of the cliques and the teachers all like her (one maybe a little too much.) Kyle and Mauricio are the lieutenant of the drill team and the stoner soccer team captain couple. Kim is the sister to one of the popular girls that is really Christian but gets shit-faced on Saturdays – just in time to pray for forgiveness on Sunday, and her boyfriend Ken is the janitor.


Only one more ep, and the season is done, there is Top Chef tomorrow, and then I have the next two weeks off from writing. *crawls* I could probably crack walnuts with my bare hands right now. Or play seven hours of Rachmaninoff without flinching.

PLEASE TELL ME I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE NOT READY FOR THE HOLIDAYS. (And to my Jewish friends, HAPPY HANUKKAH! <-- in case I'm not around after sundown.) <3
Well, my sinus infection has screwed up my sense of time, because I thought today was the 18th, not the 19th. (I'm not even going to start on how I still have holiday decorations lying around and hardly any presents bought - I'm pulling the atheist card on that.) I weirdly had a summons to court for child support (um, new folks: I have an ex. He has never paid child support. It's been years. Eh.) I raced to the court, and laughed when I got there, because RIGHT! Gov't offices. That meant at least an hour wait.

And let me tell you, there is no place on earth more depressing than a child support field office. (Thank DNA/Big Bang/God of your choice that I am financially secure.) So awful. And I feel like a jackass in clothes that are nice with a nice purse and my iPhone and...well. Some dad swanned in ready to be every lady's BFF and chatted them all up and admired their crying babies and had a portable filing cabinet on the birth mother/his significant other maybe? (reading between the lines?) and I wanted to tell him that those offices are just like the elevator: be quiet and watch the numbers.

(Oh, and it was a hilarious episode of Keystone Cops because they didn't have all of the papers, and they don't have jurisdiction, nor do they have his confirmed address and HAHAHA, it's been years, why would I think they would have this down? At least I don't need the money. My kids deserve the money, but we don't need it.)

ION, I am continually blown away by the amazing response I'm getting for this story I'm posting. I mean... a few weeks ago I was ready to delete the whole thing, just sure it was crap. (Thank you, [livejournal.com profile] flaming_muse again for talking me out of it, and beating my story up until it became something better.) I just...I've been writing fanfic for YEARS and never had this kind of reaction. HAPPY CHRISMUHKWANZUKAH TO ME!

IOON, I am sick of chicken noodle soup, but I have no energy to go to the end of the block for Tom Kha. [/my life is the hardest] [/suck it, legless orphans that are also blind]

I WOULD LIKE TO BE ENTERTAINED. And fed fudge. And biscuits. How about it, Science?
Glee last night...that was weird, what the girls were doing in their routine, right? With the weird arm pumping and waving? Or maybe it was just because of the choppy editing, IDK. ANYWAY. Recap is up! (The recap's drink is CRAZY delicious. Have you discovered honey liqueurs yet? HOLY CRAP. Nom.)

I am going to be offline mostly because after two months and change, I am FINALLY going to take my laptop in to get the LED screen repaired. (Couldn't do it myself because a) I don't trust wholesalers for LED screens and b) I don't have a clean room, and if you get anything like, say, cat hair behind it, you're going to see a big magnified hair forever. So.) Dr. Laptop thinks he can fix it in one day (I actually suspect the lamp is the problem, not the screen/cable) Thankfully I have a netbook for basics, but it's not the same. My husband just wants me to buy a new computer, to which I scoff. Wasteful! Mine is still great, the processor could stand an upgrade, but otherwise, it does everything I need. ALSO I HAVE A ONE OF A KIND CASE, and I'm not willing to part with it. I always get comments on it when I go to coffee shops. I <3 my laptop.

Oh, and I need to upload some pictures once I get it back. I made a Kindle cover over the Thanksgiving weekend from an old book I bought at that shop, Curiosities. The book? "I Was a Teenage Dwarf." Ha! (I removed all the pages, I didn't cut a hole in them. I'm not 100% satisfied with the way it turned out, but it looks cool, so... Eh, first time making one, so not too shabby.

OK. Workout, clean up, and then a date with my resident drummer, as he'll be leaving to live the life of a corporate rock star soon. *snerk*
By which I mean, of course, the penultimate Twilight Movie is out today, and soon we will be free, friends. SOON WE WILL BE FREE.

And of course I'm going to the 10am showing for recapping purposes (hoping it's as deliciously awful an experience as the first one was.) Pray/smudge a room/makeover a hobo for me, whatever your religion calls for.

In happier news, Miss Emily, who is 10, did a report on Medusa last night. I gave her some interesting things to read so we could talk about it and figure out how she wanted to do her project. She asked, "Mom, what's feminist rage?" Which led to some interesting discussions about how women have been treated through the centuries ("But that's stupid!" I know, sweetie.) So her report is on how Medusa wasn't monstrous initially, she was made that way by men fearing her.

10 years old, lady and gents. There's your Fourth Wave, and they're being led by Leslie Knope. :)

[And I can't stop singing, Don't you wish your werewolf would sparkle like me?]

OH! Last thing. If you didn't see this post of mine last night, YOU SHOULD. Especially if you are a reader of fanfic. And a reader of GLEE fanfic. Or struggled with coming out. Or care about people who struggle with coming out. <3
Whoops. I meant to have a business meeting, and it turned into a bottle of wine and talking late into the night (on a school night, no less! Tres scandale!) so I am duh-rag-ging today.

Please tell me y'all are watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Holy crap, that show is outstandingly awesome. The recap for last night is up, and here's a taste:

Taylor was going to have a “game night” with the gals, but she's just so stressed and her Life Voice Coach feels that she needs to focus on being centered with the Now, and games would symbolize Untruthfulness to her Inner Be and Peace Center.

So she foists the job onto Dana, who is more than happy to take it on, because she's, like, a professional party planner? Even though she's super busy right now, she'll totally do this and make it awesome. She's like, gonna make people play dominoes with actual bars of platinum filled with real ebony, and they'll be something like a trillion million dollars each, so...
[hair flip]


I. Love. It.

Also up, Vampire Diaries (our recapper was called away on business, and until everyone starts buying swag and advertisers start showering us with money, Actual Paying Jobs come first, mores the pity) and Boardwalk Empire, which I failed to mention last night, because see: bottle of wine.

And just a personal request from me, if you do read the girls' posts, hit the +1 or Like buttons (or tumblr, leave a comment, etc) because I can see that they get a lot of readers, but when they don't get comments or feedback, well, you know how that feels. They put in a LOT of work, a lot of hours, all with the hope of talking shop with fellow fans. Hearing "good job!" from me is like when your mom tells you you're beautiful, you know? It's nice, but... :)

ION, my friend (who I visited with last night) is an amazing artist and is going to make a cast of my head this week and hand craft a foam hair piece to my Blink Angel costume so it will look better than the wig I fashioned a few years ago. I LOVE HALLOWEEN, OH MY GOODNESS.
Like the kind where I can tuck my head under your chin. I'm 5'6", so if I need to get you an apple box, I can.

WE ARE BACK, by the way, Hey, Don't Judge Me, I mean. Crazy security breach/server farm issues, all resolved, migration hiccups, all resolved, and I miraculously still have a head of hair.

It would be super keen if y'all clicked on various links on the page to give me an idea of how much we can take. (Also, we got a pretty sweet mention on the FRONT PAGE of METAFILTER, um, right when we crashed. D'oh! But still. Pretty sweet.)

Our pool was NINETY THREE DEGREES yesterday. Doesn't that sound awful? The air was 115, so it still felt good. Kinda. We're contemplating buying a bunch of bags of ice and throwing them in. Feh. This has been the second hottest summer (and driest) in Texas history. That's saying something, y'all.

I'm on pre-'ritas, moving on to ACTUAL 'ritas. I'm a mom, I can write you a note so you can start drinking them at work, too. HERE:

Dear ( your boss's/name ),

(Your name) has a medical condition that requires them to consume massive quantities of margaritas, hourly. Thank you for your understanding, and you have a little something right there. *licks thumb, wipes cheek*

Signed,
A Mom, imbued with Mom Authority.


You're welcome.
1. HDJM is honest-and-for-true back online. (it's been a nightmare.)
2. I have the BEST WEB HOST EVER for working almost around the clock with me for the past 3 days.
3. I have not washed my hair in 2 days. I am gross, I know.
4. It is 108 degrees outside, without the heat index. (see why I feel strongly about #3)
5. It is so hot today that they shut down one of the roller coasters at Six Flags (to limit electricity use)
6. I have articles to write, but I'm not going to. I'm burned out and need 24 hours off.
7. You guys are awesome.
8. I forgot what eight was for
9. I've not had a margarita yet
10. I'm about to drink all the margaritas. Ever.

Oy. I hate to be a "Chocolate! Shoes! ACK!" Cathy-type, but FUGGIN MONDAYS. I shall reward myself with 'ritas and brisket tacos with nommy coleslaw and jalapeños. I think I deserve it.

Those to whom I owe emails, etc. gimmie a bit to decompress, and I'll be with you/fulfill promises/give you open mouth kisses later.

June 2017

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