Subject headers are for pussies

[stoney321]

Good morning!!

The evil SIL (evil because she told me my house was creepy, my neighborhood is creepy, took all of my maternity clothes, crib, stoller, car seat, didn't invite me to the baby shower, expects me to make my usual litany of baby items and not ONCE has said thank you. Nice.) had the baby. So, we are heading down to Austin in a few hours to see the new baby boy. BABY BOY!! Which pleases me. Now. For those of you who have had children, listen to this:

Had a C-section, unplanned. Been five days. They are going to a party tonight. With the baby. O_O. WHAT?!?! We asked them if her doctor knew (I mean, can the woman even go to the bathroom yet without crying?) and they pooh-pooh'd that. We offered to watch the baby and let THEM go instead. Because new frickin' baby! Germs! Hello! And it's not like she's really healthy and bounced back. She drank (alcohol and coffee - not like a glass of wine, either. Like DRINK drink.) during her pregnancy, wouldn't eat fruit or vegetables, never exercised... WTF? And that makes me sad for the little baby. Can't you suck it up and think about your new baby? BAH.

But again: new baby. And that makes me happy. I love me some newborns. So my plan is to shut up, speak when spoken to, and hold onto little Tommy (ahh!!) as much as possible. Plus, I get a break for the night as my kids are heading off to my folks' house for a sleepover. So 6th Street later! Woot!

Something else that pleases me: since we are going to see the baby now instead of next weekend, there is a slim chance I could fly up to NY next Saturday and hook up with the Slag Heap Whores and see VK on Broadway (off-Broadway, but shhh.) OMG!! That would be so awesome. We'll see. It may be stressful to swap at the airport again, as Mr. Stoney is traveling a bit longer next week. If not, I'll meet up with a few of those girls in September... plus: dovil in September!

I have a few fic recs: sweptawaybayou wrote a HOT RPS with CK/DB/VK if you are into HOTNESS, and I know you are. For those that don't like RPS, shhh. Trust Stoney. It isn't invasive like some can be. euro_fics wrote a hilarious and REALLY GOOD B/A/S that will please both the Bangels and the Spuffies. Oh, and anyone who likes to read good, funny, hot fic. And some weirdo (stoney321) wrote a fic about Drusilla coming after Connor that might be thought of as really good. And I hear she's a little down on her writing and thinks she isn't very good, so maybe you could drop her a little feedback. Or so I hear. :-)

And for the record, yes, I know I'm a whore.

Gonna go exercise, pack the kidlets up, then head off to play with a new baby! There may be a REALLY fun post tomorrow. crazydiamondsue, if you read this, I am NOT fighting! I'm a lover not a fighter!

Comments

[ex-dovil323.livejournal.com]

Poor little baby indeed! And ysy dovil in September. There are no poor little babies for me because my ovaries are already well and truely pickled. I come prepared.

NY next Saturday??!! Oh my god, so jealous. Go you! :D That would be brilliant!

PS YOU ARE A WHORE!

[kaydee23.livejournal.com]

Oh. I am so use to misuse of newborn babies.

At my previous high school, there were pregnant 14 and 15 year olds are over the building.

One year I had 3 pregnant girls in 1st period. I was at work on Friday, and none of the girls had dropped.

I had to go to the doctor on Monday.

On Tuesday, one of my male students in fist period said, "Oh, Ms. B, you missed it! J and B both had their babies and they brought them up here to school yesterday for you to see!!! Yes.

According to the students, the substitue let them come in first period and pass their newborn babies all over the classroom all period.

The administration didn't even figure out that they were in the building until 4th period (lunch) and sent them home then.

Ridiculous. Those dumb girls would have babies and drag them around for display like there damn Barbie dolls.

I hope you get to go see VK. I want to hear about the arrests and such when all you crazy women try to storm his dressing room door after the show. (Please do it after the show, and not before.)

Your neighborhood doesn't look so creey. Actually not creepy at all. Did she maybe mean in a Stepford Wife way? Naaaaah.

I printed out your story, and I'll read it later.

Have fun on 6th street.

[lynnenne]

And I hear she's a little down on her writing and thinks she isn't very good, so maybe you could drop her a little feedback.

Now I feel bad that I criticized the opening. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings... I was just trying to be constructive! The fic was good! I really, really liked it! WAH! *makes gurgling baby noises*

[somecandytalkin.livejournal.com]

Honey, I will keep excellent thoughts in my head, sending you brainwaves of happy. Hang in there with the evil SIL. You will get through it:D Good to have a plan.
Whhhooooo hooooo on NY possibility. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.
And your writing? Well, you know how I feel about that...And I can't really sum it up in a few sentences but I'll try. You can set. a. mood. Which to me, is just the dreamiest skill. Your writing is gorgeous and you can make readers laugh, cry, sexy up, creep out, think, get informed and be touched. That is quite a gift. Don't be down on yoself!
Now I must start my brainwave a sending. Hummmm..........

[julia-here.livejournal.com]

That's not creepy; Plano, now, Plano is creepy. Because I'm pretty sure Plano is a hologram.

Unplanned Csection so substantial labor, first, including bruising from dystocia? or what? Anyway, five days postsurgery of any sort is not a time for parties. My kids went directly from the hosiptal to the library, pretty much, but I needed something to read, and that was long before Amazon.com and next day delivery, pun unintentional.

The world is full of daft people, and I'm pretty sure there should be a way to insure they don't reproduce, but that doesn't diminish the utter wonder that is a newborn.

Julia, no new babies around right now, dernit

[julia-here.livejournal.com]

Also? I'm pretty much avoiding reading Drusilla right now, because it is hard enough trying to keep her voice straight in my head when I'm only dealing with canon, so, sorry, no slight intended, just pretty much Dru-ed out right now.

Julia, and she's so hard to keep from being distracted.

[lynnenne]

Also, your neighborhood? Looks beautiful and prosperous and has a golf course designed by Pete-fucking-Dye! I wanna live there when I grow up. Your SIL's remarks are just jealousy. They have to be.

[anelith.livejournal.com]

I take it this is your husband's sister? What a sweetheart. She didn't have any kids before now, I guess. Sounds as if she doesn't want her life to change one iota -- just add a baby to the scenery, or something. Like a potted plant.

Your neighborhood doesn't sound creepy, it sounds as if you have lots of places for the kids to play. That's where you get all those walking trails that you keep talking about! I'm envious.

I read the B/A/S story -- it *was* hilarious! Great stuff. I'm not usually a fan of RPS, but you say to trust you on this, so I'll bookmark it and check that out later. As for that stoney321 chick, I already told her how marvelous she was...

[crayonbreakygal.livejournal.com]

WTF? She's going out five days after a C-section? I thought that your SIL seemed a little over the top before, but now, even more so. She sounds like a real winner there. I'm surprised that she doesn't have a nanny or a wet nurse so she doesn't have to take care of the baby. OK, I'm gonna stop being a bitch now.

She thinks that your neighborhood is creepy? Can I live there? My house is falling down around our ears and it's still worth big bucks (damn California market). It looks so lovely and peaceful there. No driveby shootings there.

And that author? Man, I don't know what to say other than, more Crusilla! I can't wait to read more.

[zyrya]

Your neighbourhood is creepy. Doesn't that random sepia tone drive you bonkers?

[dusty273.livejournal.com]

I know I almost couldn't move 15 days after my c-section, let alone go out and never with babies! But then again, that's one of the reasons evil SiL is evil, isn't it? ;)

*huggles* And congratulations on baby Tommy to proud Tía Laura!

[inlovewithnight.livejournal.com]

Yes, I'm sure the baby will really appreciate the party, too. Because babies LOVE those. ::eyeroll::

Hope you had fun! :)

[poshcat.livejournal.com]

took all of my maternity clothes, crib, stoller, car seat, didn't invite me to the baby shower,

She took your stuff and then didn't invite you to the baby shower? That IS evil. Your husband's family sucks. I guess you figured that out already, though. We'll see how the party thing pans out when the baby cries and her stitches pull and her hormones surge and her husband ditches her to talk to other adults.

As someone firmly entrenched in middle middle-class, I am so jealous of your neighbourhood. The beach! ::writhes with ecstasy::

Enjoy the new baby, sweetie. He's going to need all the sane vibes you can throw his way. :0P

[crazydiamondsue.livejournal.com]

Dude - if you are in NYC, I will turn you into a fighter! I'll throw out my lipgloss case, rip out my earrings and throw down.

You're not in NYC, are you? I just tried to call...*pouts* Have to pee. How was the baby? Good smellin'?

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Yes, I AM a whore, and don't you forget it.

I tried to pickle my ovaries on our trip. I may have been successful.
*staggers*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Lands, your tales of HS make me cringe.

My neighborhood ISN'T creepy. But it's clean and tidy and new, so she has to call it Stepford to have something to complain about. Bleh. I have golden eagles and red-tailed hawks and herons! it pleases me greatly.

6th street? Unbelievably packed. but it made for fantastic people watching. I'll post, as it was just craziness.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

*hears to gurgling, picks you up and snuggles you*

No no no!! That first bit didn't work for you, and that's fine! My god, if we had to feel bad about not liking every little thing our friends (VL or RL) did, we'd be up shit creek, right?

No, it's more that I usually write the poo-poo Stooge humor and get everyone to come over and laugh, and when I try and write something "good" it's met with meh. Which is all about me, and how I'm a big fucking titty-baby. :-D

*powders your behind and sniffs you all over*
I think I'm creeping myself out now.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

EEE!! I;m sheilding this comment from Mr. Stoney because the fact that you know Pete Dye would make him drop me like a hot potato and pick you up for lurve.

My SIL imagines herself to be a "starving artist" which translates to their shit-hole being more genuine or real, or something, and big bro and sis living in suburbia is lame and "selling out" or something. Fuck that. I don't need drug labs behind me and a pedophile next door like when we lived in the "cool" part of town last year.

I'll take my trails and green and space and clean, yes, please.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Dude, I'll send you an email about my SIL.

You need to come up this week and have fun with me, right??

*boingboing*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Dude, Plano IS creepy. Nuevo-riche assholes that leave their kids for two weeks with a credit card, and they wonder why their kids get dropped off at the hospital by their "friends" when they overdose on heroin? Nice.

Honestly, I think she has a doctor that would rather perform the C-section than risk a new mother suing him for the baby being born with a goofy head and blame little Johnny's asthma on the stress of birth.

Thank god my husband pulled his brother aside (the wife is the SIL) and told him he REALLY needs to keep the baby away from people for at least a month. So we babysat and let the dumbasses go to a party.

And the baby? Made all my mascara end up on a tissue. Little fingers, toes, scrinched up eyes.... I need to borrow newborns more often. Makes it easier to fall asleep with one perched on your shoulder.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

No, no worries, as you are aware that I got SO involved in NAIR (um, that's a bad acronym for a great story) that I'm waiting for it to be complete so I can devour it in it's entirety.

Thought of you on the drive with all the buttercups, Mexican Hat, bluebonnets and paintbrush blooming on the road sides.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

No, she's the kind that sees living on the south side of Knox-Henderson to be cool because they are living "with the people." you know? Because they couldn't afford to move a few blocks north? And that sounds shitty, but you get my drift. She's pooh-poohing our house because it's "lame suburbia."

We'll see what they say when their baby gets close to school age. Old run-down apartments where there are no children? Yeah, that ain't creepy.

OH!! My MIL went to the hospital to wait to see the baby, was there in the delivery room, and they stayed for a few days. When I had Emily (their FIRST grandchild) they cam the day after we got home from the hospital and stuck around for the afternoon, then left.

I'm done with that particular branch of my husband's family. They are just too mind boggling.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Brian is two years younger than you, and his wife is a year younger than me?? And now he's going to be a cop? HUH? Beth, she just makes me laugh. The way she talks... She tried to tell us a story about a ghost, and referred to it as a "haint." And she's from Illinois. Mr. S looked at her and said, "what?" She blushed and said "you know, ghost."

I wanted to say, we KNOW what it is, Ethel, but tain't no body said "haint" since Aught Duece. WTF??

She's evil because she's rude, insults me, commented on how weird Austin and Morgan were for doing something (like, made a "bad smell" face!!!) and is just FULL of opinions on EVERYTHING. basically, she's a worse version of me. I KNOW!!

Thanks for the link! My email is fooked from being gone, and I saw the email from Blair before I left. 10Q. (dad has a box of veggies for you at the house. )

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

this is my husband's brother's wife. no, no kids, and the kind of woman who doesn't like kids, to boot. Let's have a baby! *sigh* When we were there she started moaning about these past few days were the longest days of her life, and how glad she was to get out of the house. Uh... And no post-partum, it seems. Just good ol' her.

I think there are something like 1400 acres of open space in our neighborhood? Sweet. If you have a frisbee dog or kids... plenty of room for running. *shrugs* I love it, so if she doesn't... That means I get the added bonus of her not moving here. Yay!! :-)

Wasn't that fic by euro_fics great?? I loved it. I am VERY specific on the type of RPS I read (mainly, I want it to read like a fic, and not like I'm looking through a camera lens. Make sense?) So it's a good one. *fans self*

And you are marvelous, and feel free to ignore my whining. Mr. S said I was just aprehensive about having to deal with the SIL. Guess what? He was right. Life is fine.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I KNOW!! She mentioned several times how HARD it was to just be at home with the baby. I wanted to ask her if she hadn't thought of that before hand? And she is off on maternity leave until July, so... It's a cruel. Cruel summer.

We moved here almost a year ago today and lived in a cool old bungalow in the artist part of town. And when it rained half the house shifted so you couldn't open/shut the doors/windows over there, or we had 90 year old pipes so hot water was an adventure... Charming, lovely details, yes. 100 year old garden *cries*, but new house? Tight as a drum? Lots of rooms and (gasp!) CLOSETS!! Yeah, I don't regret high-tailing it to the sticks. And where we are, we are surrounded by folks from Asia, India, Russia... It's nice.

Our cousins are selling their house in San Jose and we almost choked when we heard the selling price. And it's only 1300 square feet! You may be sitting on a gold mine... Come to Texas. :-)

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Dude, I KNOW. Except, it's really good for my skin tone (I'm an autumn) so there's that. But I miss pastel. Ha ha ha!!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Can you imagine dumping your 5 day old baby in someone's arms to go away for a night??? I could barely enjoy myself a month out, I missed by boy so much.

But. HE IS BEAUTIFUL!! Ay yi yi. Tia Laura es muy happy. Hee!! He's so pretty and small and wee and quiet with HUGE dark blue eyes and RED HAIR. A whole head full! And he coos when you rub it!! (I just cried and kissed and snuggled him. So, so sweet.)

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

She's sofa king wee todd it.

But I DID have fun. And apparently MTV was in town so it was a MAD-HOUSE. but good people watching, to be sure.

Dueling Freds!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I know! If anything, stupid on her part to not bleed me dry for gifts, you know? And... I make baby clothes! And blankets! And bags! Dummy. But, I got to play with the baby for most of the day and evening, and he is cuddly and wee and sweet and makes teeny little noises and it made me soooo happy. Then Mr. S and I hit the bars, got sauced, had nookie, woke up late... Good trip.

Are you sure you can't adjust to the heat? I mean, beach AND pools within walking distance, not to mention most houses here have pools in the backyard, anyway. But... no snow. But me! And drinking! MOVE HERE. *cries*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

No, I'm not. I'm trying to go NEXT weekend when the play hits off-Broadway. We'll see. I'm getting stern glances from Mr. S.

BABY. Smelling. Alkeehaul. Black bikers! MTV! Cheap drinks. 6th street. Penthouse suite! Full on public ass grab. More coming in details to follow.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Oh, LAWS yes. Evah since dey done slit dat crooked dirty dawg out in dey briar patch, dey ain't nevah had no peace o'mind since din.

Laws a massey. Hurry up, nah and eat up dem cornpone fore I take uh switch to ya backside, laws.

(How's your back? Are you mobile? Not making you cry? Goddamned pussy.)

[crazydiamondsue.livejournal.com]

Call meeeeeeee!!!!

[somecandytalkin.livejournal.com]

Okay, right, and *boingboing*!

[mskakaako.livejournal.com]

That SIL is nucking futs. Seriously.
Poor bebe with the OMG!BAD pre-natal and post-natal care.

Also, don't talk smack about my Stoney's Crusilla fic. It is brilliant. Really. I'm not trying to get in 'good' with you or nuttin. I'd give my eye tooth to write like that. I'm not sure what an eye tooth is, but even if I did...I'm sure I'd volunteer to give it away for your MAD WRITING SKILLZ!!! <-Observe my sad writing. Here I sit, with bad teeth and nothing to show for it. :(

Lastly, NY?! Why couldn't you wait until July? That's when I'm going! ::whines:: You're also going to NZ to visit Dovil? Damn!