Armor Processed Meat-Product

[stoney321]

A.K.A.: generic spam.

I am BORED. My house is clean, laundry's done, too windy to play outside.... SPAM. Just got a catalogue in the mail for some weird company that sells the candies your grandmother had in her stinky pantry for six months, then tries to make you eat. You know that candy: like Circus Peanuts - but all dried out. Those weird wrapped Brach's candies with odd flavors like "Licorice Weasel" and "Rootbeer Cherry Surprise."

EXAMPLE: Chocolate Dipped Jelly Sticks. (35 sticks each). Brown Bread in a CAN. (In two flavors!) BARLEY POPS. In ANIMAL SHAPES. I couldn't make this stuff up, y'all.

And I'm a leetle lemming with Sue's Meme, because it'll be fun. Or time consuming.

1. Go to my memories, and pick out a line or two from one of my stories (minimum ten words, though of course you can choose more than that). Post that quote in the comments.
2. I will respond with which story I think that quote is from.
3. I will entertain the first person to stump me in the manner of their choice.

DO EET.

Comments

[crazydiamondsue.livejournal.com]

Licorice Weasel - cause weasel makes anything funny.

And the meme quote:
"Shhh." A kiss for silence, fingertips over skull to soothe, lips on the hollow between collarbones to encourage.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

D'oh!!

HOw the hell can I be stumped right off the bat? Isn't that from my David Boreanaz/Vinvent Kartheiser RPS?

*bites lip and DOES NOT CHEAT*

[crazydiamondsue.livejournal.com]

That's from "Wrath at Cannes." Hah! In your face! Stoney's my bitch! Stoney's my bitch! But it *was* RPS...so you're kinda right. :)

I would like...damn. What would I like? Possibilities. Endless. Oh! I want you to finish the Buffy CD biotch! (Or, if that's too taxing, I would like a mix CD on theme of your choice.) I call BFF perogative on asking for amusement that requires postage.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

D'OH!!! I knew I had it wrong. It was too... nice to be the DB/VK fic. CRAP. I need to re-read that and fix the wonky tense changes that are lurking within...

AND DONE. (Gimmie a day or two to finish it.)

[bitchygrrl.livejournal.com]

I am praying to God that I stump you. Because I want more of this . . .
Unsure hands reach up and around to grip and then squeeze. Kisses deepen, breathing comes in gasps now, nips taken are at times gentle, at times meaning to draw blood.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

HA!! That's Obi-Wan/Anakin!

right?

[bitchygrrl.livejournal.com]

Soooo close yet soooo very wrong. It's Ewan/Hayden rps. In fact you were the 1st rps writer I ever read. It is because of you that now in addition to an Obi/Ani thing I am addicted to Ewan/Hayden, hell I started a comm. *evil laugh* You are now my BEEOTCH.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

NOOOOOO!! Really? That isn't from...

Dammit. :-D

[bitchygrrl.livejournal.com]

It's from the Wrath of Cannes babe. Again I remeind you that you started me on the rps path to hell. What with your believable characterization of Hayden as a top (thank you), and you pulled out the David/Vinnie on me. When I got hell I'm wearing a t-shirt that says "stoney sent me" BTW I was actually looking for the Ewan/Hayden you wrote where they are at the Japanese tea house. *loves that fic* So I'm sure you can guess what I want.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Argh. I actually pulled that out this weekend, intent on correcting verb tense shifts I found - I hate that not being finished, as well.

OKAY. Gimmie a bit, but I will finish it!

[bitchygrrl.livejournal.com]

Okay *waits patiently*
Seriously I do miss your take on Ewan/Hayden as they are a tough pair to get right, or right IMO. They are easy for PWP, but for more substantial work . . . I have 3 unfinished E/H non PWP's myself. I posted them but never continued. *syicks tongue out at real life*

[julia-here.livejournal.com]

I'm not feeling memish today, alas, nor am I getting a damned thing done, due to extreme fogginess inside and out (send a little wind, blow this stuff away, it's making it impossible to get a thought finished!)

However, in the going on-line and finding a whole lot of stuff you don't want realm, I spent a whole lot of Saturday night shoe-shopping online, and came up with this wonderful piece of information: There are thousands of pairs of shoes out there in my size and specifications, except every one I like is already available at Nordstroms or one of the three shoe shops in Olympia.

And nobody, nowhere has a replacement for the calf-high laceup boots which I bought in 1969 and finally wore to tattered, unfixable bits in 1992.

Julia, wishing to be rich, rich rich and able to order custom made boots.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Custom made boots. Yes'm. Although you can find good boots here custom fit for about 100.

But oh, to have all of the shoes I see and covet at Nordstroms...

[julia-here.livejournal.com]

I have Very Bad Feet- not diabetic feet, but feet that were apparently put together wrong before birth, and have gotten worse with age. So comfy and well-fitting shoes are, like, manditory and hard to find.

And my uber-favorite lace-up ankle boot, Santana of Canada's "Hazel" now has, horror of horrors ZIPPERS! For EASY ON OFF! And in my mind, zipper boots are zipper boots and lace-up boots are lace up boots and something that's both is UGLY and STUPID and LIKE UNTO WEARING SUSPENDERS AND A BELT! So I am indignant, and I am shopping for the perfect replacement.

Julia, when I get reborn, I want smaller boobs, narrower feet, and better teeth, so I won't have to spend so much money and bother on upkeep

[cherusha.livejournal.com]

"While his hands moved like small birds over her body, her hands moved with purpose."


Really? Like teeny birdies? Did he do the flapping his hands in mimicry of wings --thing? :*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

*GASP!*

You mock my pain!! THAT is from Singular, the Wesley/Fred ficlet.

YES. His hands were litke shitting, hopping pigeons.

:x and :* to you, too. *smooosh*

[hellziggy.livejournal.com]

And with that he nuzzled his face into the crusty, pokey hair of his lover.

[hellziggy.livejournal.com]

Aww. You got it. :(
I was hoping you would be my bitch too!
We ran into a copy-protection snag with the Ultraviolet DVDs but hubby says that brother-in-law has a program that will work on it... I will poke him about it again tonight.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

WHEEE!! Wee!Spike, yo! Hee hee!! (I was WAITING for someone to do a comedy one!)

[hellziggy.livejournal.com]

You make other comment go all disappeary!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I posted twice! Derp!

[zyrya]

I kept reading this as "candles" and thinking no wonder your mother turned out the way she did if she was forced to eat licorice candles. Unless it was your paternal grandmother, in which case I lack information about your father to contemplate the matter. Or maybe you're using a generic grandmother, in which case you're FUCKING WITH MY MIND.

And then I realised it was "candies".

But how bad can they be if they're in animal shapes? Oh, wait. Peeps. Never mind.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Animal shapes do not always equate goodness. Peeps is a good one. Fish stick kitties could be another, unless you had cocktail sauce for dipping.

And why do *I* never get comment porn? Must you and I always have clandestine meetings in Posh's journal? *pines*

Licorice candles = ME THROWING UP.

[zyrya]

I'd be molesting you more if I weren't so prone to misreading your posts and thus spending precious moments minutes going "huh?" instead of going the grope.

Peeps are an abomination. They sounded extremely cool until an obliging American friend sent me some, and I made the mistake of actually eating one. Also circus peanuts. Even the dog wouldn't eat the circus peanuts, and she once ate a jar of pickled onions.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

AND they lick themselves. If something chooses it's own ass over a piece of candy, well... there's your clue.

So you aren't going to pin me against a wall and slide my shirt open with the flat of your hand and lick along my collarbone? What the hell?

[trepkos.livejournal.com]

"Licorice Weasel" and "Rootbeer Cherry Surprise."


Do they do "Crunchy Frog"?

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Not yet... *fears*

[allegraconbrio.livejournal.com]

Will you just entertain me? *big droopy spaniel eyes* Heee.

I am late to the meme, and this is likely a gimme (finger and thumb to my forehead) - but on with the show...

"Too bad I never learned to knit. I guess I'd be half-way through a pair of booties right about now. Not like it will ever need booties, however."

(my gramma so had circus peanuts in her cupboard - heh)

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

(did she have the stale bag of Mother's Iced Animal Cookies in there, too?)

HOORAY!! My Snyder/Maypr Mpreg! Bwah ha ha!

[hellziggy.livejournal.com]

Here's another one since you got the last one so fast:

"Then he felt something heavy crash into him and force him to the ground."

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Huh. I wrote that? And started a sentence with "then?"

I have absolutely NO IDEA! (Oh, and re: Ultraviolet. Dood! You don't have to go to so much trouble for me! Seriously! If it's easy to do, you rule, if not, don't sweat it and you STILL rule!!)

[hellziggy.livejournal.com]

"As he got closer to the woods at the edge of the Garvey farm, he started getting panicked. He still couldn’t see Andy. Then he felt something heavy crash into him and force him to the ground. His head hit the hard packed dirt and he saw stars for a minute. When his eyesight cleared, he saw that Andy was straddling his hips with both of his arms pinned to his sides. Andy had a grin on his face until he saw Albert wincing from the pain in his skull."

Yay! I win! :) This means I can demand sexual favors from you, right?


and re: Ultraviolet. Hubby should have had this figured out by now, because most DVD have copy protection, so I'm going to make him get it to work! I'm not going to any trouble for this, I'm making hubby do it!

[hellziggy.livejournal.com]

BTW, Little House on the Prairie slash? You are SOOOOO going to Hell! When you get there say "hi." I'll be the chick wearing the "Stoney sent me" t-shirt.
*looks around* Oh, another one. That must be bitchygrrl.
*looks around some more* Damn! We're all wearing the same shirt!