OH MY GOD.

[stoney321]

Kenneth Lay died.

And I was looking forward to him going to jail for 45 years. That's morbid, I know, but we don't like him much here in Texas.

[ETA] because I hate having negative posts and nothing but, and I hate spamming LJ with multiple entries (it's a thing.)

While on my run this morning, I had my brain on my crack!fic set in Texas - like Dukes of Hazzard meets Falcon Crest meets Spuffy AU, and started thinking of made-up cowboy songs for the range.

• "I Was Gonna Spend My Night With A Sheep (Until I Met You)"


• "I Got Dust In Places (I Didn't Know I Had)"


• "You're Once, Twice, Three Times a Cowboy (But Don't Tell Irlene)"


• "Smells Like Beans Again"


• "Got A Rattler In My Shoe (And I Still Don't Miss You)"


• "Scorpion Hearts"


• "Long Dusty Trail And No Rain In Sight (So Why Don't We Screw?)"


• "Lonely Sheep Make For Warm Bedrolls"


• "Beef Jerky Again?"


• "The Cows Are Getting Suspicious"


• "Hard-assed And Bowlegged: A Love Song"

More and more fics are pouring in for the Gud Summries Ficafunathingathon, so be sure to check them out! Read and feed, people. Some folks that participated? This is their FIRST ficathon! That's so cool!

Also, in email the other day with dovil - who I miss around here something terr'ble - we played around with cracked out story ideas, based on cheesy 80s romance movies. I swear to god, I may snap and write the following:
"What about Mask? And Spike can be deformed and doomed and Buffy is the blind girl at horse camp that he teaches how to understand color and Angel can play the part of Cher!!

And there can be a song at the end when Cher finds her dead kid (Spike) set to "I Believe"
"Do you believe that Rocky is dead?
do you believe he's dead?
I can feel something inside his bed (gropes, grabs a shoulder)
I really don't think it's large enough, no!"

WHY AM I SO AWFUL INSIDE?!?! *cracks the hell up*

Comments

[viciouswishes.livejournal.com]

The assholes always get away with it somehow, don't they?

[cherusha.livejournal.com]

...whoa.

On the other hand, his jail would probably be a lavish spa-like preserve with cruel and unusual punishment being limitations on truffle rations. *cheers up?*

[tx-cronopio.livejournal.com]

I know! Where is the justice, O Lord, where is the justice? I know he wouldn't actually have been sent to Huntsville, but a girl can dream...

[floweringjudas.livejournal.com]

I THOUGHT OF YOU WHEN I SAW THAT.

"Heart attack" my ass. Arsenic in a hollowed-out tooth, I'm guessing. *nods*

[ladycat777.livejournal.com]

I hate thinking like this, because a man is dead, but really? It wouldn't surprise me to learn that he'd encouraged this, to some degree. Because death was the easy way out, the final 'fuck you' to everyone he'd already fucked six ways from sunday, dry.

[moosesal.livejournal.com]

Well I'm going to go with the positive and say that at least taxpayers' money won't be wasted on his trial and housing him in a prison. Too bad that saved money can't go to all those employees who got screwed.

[menomegirl.livejournal.com]

I agree with viciouswishes. The assholes always get out of it somehow.

*twitches* You know, the cushy prison is really outside of Beaumont city limits, right? *defends my home town*

[(Anonymous)]

Dn't worry about it. G-d has a morbid sense of humor (don't belive me? Just look around) and I'm sure old Ken is being punished in a thoroughly imaginative and appropriate way.

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

Don't worry about it. G-d has a morbid sense of humor (don't belive me? Just look around) and I'm sure old Ken is being punished in a thoroughly imaginative and appropriate way.

[petzipellepingo.livejournal.com]

Points to icon. He's just trying to get our sympathy...

[crayonbreakygal.livejournal.com]

Saw the "Aspen" part of the story. Pffft. He got off easy.

I giggled through your song names. Cracked me up. *snicker*

[julia-here.livejournal.com]

At our house we're calling this "The Milosovic defense."

Because we're crude that way.

Bastidge.

Julia,

[entrenous88.livejournal.com]

"Got A Rattler In My Shoe (And I Still Don't Miss You)"

FOR THE WIN!!!!!

[st_salieri.livejournal.com]

Hee. Houston-ite here, and I have to report the same sense of morbid letdown on hearing the Ken Lay news. I'm glad I'm not the only one, because I was feeling evil. It just seems so...lame, after that trial from hell.

[screaming-mimie.livejournal.com]

Ken Lay is faking it.

And that's all I've got to say about that.

[shaddyr]

"Long Dusty Trail And No Rain In Sight (So Why Don't We Screw?)"

Uhm. Yeah, that one. Hee!

I swear to god, I may snap and write the following:
"What about Mask? And Spike can be deformed and doomed and Buffy is the blind girl at horse camp that he teaches how to understand color and Angel can play the part of Cher!!

You are a sick, sick woman.

Why don't I have you on my flist yet?

::adds::

[terilyn4.livejournal.com]

hey Stoney, your song titles cracked me up. I love your brain woman :D

[slackerace.livejournal.com]

I swear, Ken Lay killed himself, but they are calling it passing by heart disease so that his family can cash in life insurance. You can't trust those Aspenites.

[anelith.livejournal.com]

I thought of you when I saw that he died in the paper this morning. Kind of surprising that he made it through the stress of the trial, only to die now that it's down to the boring old jail time!

[deborahc.livejournal.com]

And I was looking forward to him going to jail for 45 years.

I know. I feel as if we've been cheated. We wuz robbed - this time of revenge. He got to die at home. In his mansion.