OH MY GOD.

[stoney321]

Kenneth Lay died.

And I was looking forward to him going to jail for 45 years. That's morbid, I know, but we don't like him much here in Texas.

[ETA] because I hate having negative posts and nothing but, and I hate spamming LJ with multiple entries (it's a thing.)

While on my run this morning, I had my brain on my crack!fic set in Texas - like Dukes of Hazzard meets Falcon Crest meets Spuffy AU, and started thinking of made-up cowboy songs for the range.

• "I Was Gonna Spend My Night With A Sheep (Until I Met You)"


• "I Got Dust In Places (I Didn't Know I Had)"


• "You're Once, Twice, Three Times a Cowboy (But Don't Tell Irlene)"


• "Smells Like Beans Again"


• "Got A Rattler In My Shoe (And I Still Don't Miss You)"


• "Scorpion Hearts"


• "Long Dusty Trail And No Rain In Sight (So Why Don't We Screw?)"


• "Lonely Sheep Make For Warm Bedrolls"


• "Beef Jerky Again?"


• "The Cows Are Getting Suspicious"


• "Hard-assed And Bowlegged: A Love Song"

More and more fics are pouring in for the Gud Summries Ficafunathingathon, so be sure to check them out! Read and feed, people. Some folks that participated? This is their FIRST ficathon! That's so cool!

Also, in email the other day with dovil - who I miss around here something terr'ble - we played around with cracked out story ideas, based on cheesy 80s romance movies. I swear to god, I may snap and write the following:
"What about Mask? And Spike can be deformed and doomed and Buffy is the blind girl at horse camp that he teaches how to understand color and Angel can play the part of Cher!!

And there can be a song at the end when Cher finds her dead kid (Spike) set to "I Believe"
"Do you believe that Rocky is dead?
do you believe he's dead?
I can feel something inside his bed (gropes, grabs a shoulder)
I really don't think it's large enough, no!"

WHY AM I SO AWFUL INSIDE?!?! *cracks the hell up*

Comments

[viciouswishes.livejournal.com]

The assholes always get away with it somehow, don't they?

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

All the local news here have dropped everything to tal, speculate, and turn to the man on the street. There's a sense of unsatisfaction here, to be sure.

I can't wait to hear Dubya's "remorse," especially since he and Laura are close personal friends. 0_o

[cherusha.livejournal.com]

...whoa.

On the other hand, his jail would probably be a lavish spa-like preserve with cruel and unusual punishment being limitations on truffle rations. *cheers up?*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Heh. You know, the only "cushy" prison (Fed. prison) is in Beaumont, a town just outside of Houston, so I bet he would quickly become the personal "friend" of Bubba weight-lifting golf club bandit. :)

(Why is the whole neighborhood at my house when my CHILDREN ARE FISHING WITH THEIR DAD?? *shoos them off my lawn*)

[tx-cronopio.livejournal.com]

I know! Where is the justice, O Lord, where is the justice? I know he wouldn't actually have been sent to Huntsville, but a girl can dream...

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Well, he screwed enough folks in the Houston to Beaumont region, it wouldn't have fared better for him there.

[floweringjudas.livejournal.com]

I THOUGHT OF YOU WHEN I SAW THAT.

"Heart attack" my ass. Arsenic in a hollowed-out tooth, I'm guessing. *nods*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Heh. YES. You are so wise.

[ladycat777.livejournal.com]

I hate thinking like this, because a man is dead, but really? It wouldn't surprise me to learn that he'd encouraged this, to some degree. Because death was the easy way out, the final 'fuck you' to everyone he'd already fucked six ways from sunday, dry.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

OUCH. And mmm, hmm. You did see that he died in his home in ASPEN.

[moosesal.livejournal.com]

Well I'm going to go with the positive and say that at least taxpayers' money won't be wasted on his trial and housing him in a prison. Too bad that saved money can't go to all those employees who got screwed.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

See, there you go being all smart and logical. Excellent point.

And ditto on the diversion of funds.

[menomegirl.livejournal.com]

I agree with viciouswishes. The assholes always get out of it somehow.

*twitches* You know, the cushy prison is really outside of Beaumont city limits, right? *defends my home town*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Heh, my ex-husband helped BUILD it. And isn't it a Texas law to say all outlying towns are either next to Houston, Dallas, or San Antonio? I was extrapolating with Beaumont. :D

[(Anonymous)]

Dn't worry about it. G-d has a morbid sense of humor (don't belive me? Just look around) and I'm sure old Ken is being punished in a thoroughly imaginative and appropriate way.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Heh. That's a fantastic way of looking at it. (I"m assuming this is either A2Zmom or Kita, in which case: hello!)

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

Don't worry about it. G-d has a morbid sense of humor (don't belive me? Just look around) and I'm sure old Ken is being punished in a thoroughly imaginative and appropriate way.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Heh - guessed who you were!

And right - I mean, just look the penguin! That's a fantastic gigglefest! The tuxedo-clad Jerry Lewis' of the animal world.

[petzipellepingo.livejournal.com]

Points to icon. He's just trying to get our sympathy...

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Haha! Well, he has failed spectacularly. :D

*pets the bunny because AWWW!*

[crayonbreakygal.livejournal.com]

Saw the "Aspen" part of the story. Pffft. He got off easy.

I giggled through your song names. Cracked me up. *snicker*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Srsly.

And heee! Hooray! I hate being grumpy - must. have. jokes!

Your icon never fails to crack me up, btw.

[julia-here.livejournal.com]

At our house we're calling this "The Milosovic defense."

Because we're crude that way.

Bastidge.

Julia,

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I like your kind of crude.

FARGING bastidge.

♥

[entrenous88.livejournal.com]

"Got A Rattler In My Shoe (And I Still Don't Miss You)"

FOR THE WIN!!!!!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Ahahahaha!! Man, I get seriously stream-of-conscious when I exercise. Translation: insane in my brain. I don't even think that one makes sense.

Heee!! (I love your Bones icon!)

[st_salieri.livejournal.com]

Hee. Houston-ite here, and I have to report the same sense of morbid letdown on hearing the Ken Lay news. I'm glad I'm not the only one, because I was feeling evil. It just seems so...lame, after that trial from hell.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Hey there! Why, you're practically kin! :D (DFW, myself. Husband from Houston)

No, it's not evil to be upset about an interruption in justice. What he, Skilling, Fatow and co. did to people here and in California is just mind-boggling and cruel.

moosesal put a nice spin on it, however: at least no more tax dollars will go towards his trial or pay for his incaceration.

[screaming-mimie.livejournal.com]

Ken Lay is faking it.

And that's all I've got to say about that.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

GAH. Dead, dead, dead. Kenneth Lay is dead.

Um, sing that to the Monty Python tune so it doesn't make me seem so ghoulish. :D

Also: HI!!

[shaddyr]

"Long Dusty Trail And No Rain In Sight (So Why Don't We Screw?)"

Uhm. Yeah, that one. Hee!

I swear to god, I may snap and write the following:
"What about Mask? And Spike can be deformed and doomed and Buffy is the blind girl at horse camp that he teaches how to understand color and Angel can play the part of Cher!!

You are a sick, sick woman.

Why don't I have you on my flist yet?

::adds::

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Yay! Someone who likes crazy songs, JOY! (And seriously: if I get to be too much, don't hesitate about flist trimmage - I don't take offense to that stuff.)

And Can't you see Angel in his 70s Faith-flashback feathered hair flipping it over his shoulder as Cher?

In Bob Mackie? *snerk*

[terilyn4.livejournal.com]

hey Stoney, your song titles cracked me up. I love your brain woman :D

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Wheee!! That's the direct result of lack of sleep, caffeine, the husband's iPod set to country music.

:D

[slackerace.livejournal.com]

I swear, Ken Lay killed himself, but they are calling it passing by heart disease so that his family can cash in life insurance. You can't trust those Aspenites.

[anelith.livejournal.com]

I thought of you when I saw that he died in the paper this morning. Kind of surprising that he made it through the stress of the trial, only to die now that it's down to the boring old jail time!

[deborahc.livejournal.com]

And I was looking forward to him going to jail for 45 years.

I know. I feel as if we've been cheated. We wuz robbed - this time of revenge. He got to die at home. In his mansion.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I think the "in his Aspen home" is the most aggravating part of this. ARGH!