Hump Day, but not in the fun way

[stoney321]

• get Rx re-filled
• take Sally for check-up 9:20
• take Sally for looooooong walk okay, it was medium, so go again later
• get milk (no "got milk" jokes please. I'm talking to myself here. Can you hear me now? Good.)
• get snacks for Em's class - no peanuts because parents are soft and weird and make up food allergies
• clean dog bed - phew
• price those Chinese Fringe Flower shrubs - 5 gallon and a blue point juniper
• get 40 lbs. compost/dig out last of the ugly shrubs
• write those two WiPs and quit dicking around
• remember: that one needs loads more violence

So there's this one fandom I quasi-participate in, I say quasi because I only write fic there and comment rarely. Because they are FUGGIN' IRRITATING, those people. Like, I want to brain 98% of the fandom participants. V young, v much with chips on their shoulders, and most cannot spell half the words in a sentence to save their lives. And the "elite" in the fandom are just as bad, except think they're the aws0me0rzz because they were "first." So why do I stick around? I have no idea. Oh, because I love the source material, which is quite clever, hence the boggling by me at who's into this stuff. I just wish some grownups belonged over there.

There was a fic posted last night that everyone was oohing and ahhing over ("I want to be you as a writer when I grow up, omg eleventy numbers exclamation points") and it was... I mean, it was okay. It was very amatuerish. As in, "Dialogue of being saidness," Person verb adverbed. "More continued dialogue in simple terms." Every. Single. Sentence. There was a reminder of hair color so you knew who was who. "The blonde replied becomingly." That sort of thing. For pages!!

And... this fandom has potential for daaaaaark fic. Which, yay! But I really REALLY want to refer these girls to luvsbitch so they can get how to write BDSM with any semblance of realism, because they obviously have only watched Cinemax porn, or something. I'm pretty vanilla, but I know how a piss-gag works. WOW. Good morning, everyone! :D I dun no. There was a good fic about getting piercings, and the sexual rush from that the other day that was pretty right on. I mean, it was mediocre, but the writer obviously knew what she was talking about, so that made the piercing part really good. The sex part was just... meh. I don't know. I think you have to work harder to sell me on these people boning each other.

It's like coming across a Neville Longbottom/Draco Malfoy fic where they are laying on the grass playing with each other's hair and sharing their dreams. It's like... how did they get to that point? Because... (And ahaha, now I want that story to read.) Bah.

Veronica Mars is... Well, let's just say I keep forgetting it's on. I'm ready for things to amp up over there. Hmmm. Now, time to hit that list. Aaaaaaaaaaand break! *clap*

Comments

[petzipellepingo.livejournal.com]

Ahem (http://petzipellepingo.livejournal.com/1335132.html#cutid1).
Veronica Mars is... Well, let's just say I keep forgetting it's on. I'm ready for things to amp up over there. And for Keith and Veronica to behave like Keith and Veronica.

40 lbs. of compost! Iz jealous as I contemplate frozen tundra.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Whoops, I meant 5 bags OF compost in 40lbs increments. :D So... you don't want to hear that it got to 70 degrees yesterday? Heh. I <3 Texas.

And I'm almost wanting Giulliani to run, as that will shut down Romney's bid pretty fast. He's more recognizable to Americans.

[harmonyfb.livejournal.com]

And... this fandom has potential for daaaaaark fic. Which, yay! But I really REALLY want to refer these girls to luvsbitch so they can get how to write BDSM with any semblance of realism, because they obviously have only watched Cinemax porn, or something.

Now I'm dying to know which fandom. Tell, tell!

And yeah, my position has always been that you shouldn't write sex if you haven't had sex.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

....Metalocalypse. Which is a show about a made-up death metal band, where there's torture and murder and random acts of violence and bizarre sex hinted at. And it's hilarious, too. I'm totally going back to the days of hair-bands vs. Actual Metal Music with these girls. There's all of that chibi/Wii crap artwork (which, I'm NOT into fanart, at ALL) and girlification of these grungy metal heads and... it's just WEIRD.

I know, I know. Random and uninteresting to just about everyone. :D (If they would just, you know, LOOK at a Judas Priest album cover to get started on the path to satanic metal... Hahaha.)

And while I know some people who can write SMOKING HOT SEX who had not really been around the world and ay yi yi (shout out, Kitten!), for the most part, I'm going to agree with you.

O/T Metalocalypse

[beadbeauty.livejournal.com]

I found the lyrics to the them song and just about died laughing while reading it. "I'll Teach You who rock" holy crap.

I think I have Alison into it now. It's just so funny!

[soundingsea.livejournal.com]

Heh, I wish I had the time to participate in that fandom in any capacity other than reading your fic. Honestly my tolerance for the very, very young is going the way of the dodo. What I don't get, though, is why the young *like* this show. Shouldn't they be watching a cartoon about floppy-haired emo boys cutting themselves? :)

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHAHA. Oh, but see here's the thing. THAT'S HOW THEY WRITE THEM. And I'm all... do you even understand the SOURCE material?? And then you have the grrls that are sew hardcore, omg, and they're all SHITCOCKFUCKCUNT and smeared in blood and...

Dude.

Heh, we'll make a side fandom with just the two of us and we'll rock out with our cocks out. Hahaha.

[entrenous88.livejournal.com]

Like, I want to brain 98% of the fandom participants.
Hahahahahahaha!

I think you have to work harder to sell me on these people boning each other.
I hear you. I think sometimes there can be fics (and not even just pwps) in which there's boning and there's no sense made of it, but it can work if the participants/narrative reveal that there's avoidance, self-deluding, willful pushing ahead despite huge contradictions. I think if there's a sense of awareness that it's happening (that explanations are being withheld or skirted), you know?

It's like coming across a Neville Longbottom/Draco Malfoy fic where they are laying on the grass playing with each other's hair and sharing their dreams
Oh come on -- don't tease me! Where's the link to that? And now I wish I'd written it first!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Oh, sure with the PWPs. Completely on board with you. There are people (you are one) that can just jump into the porn and totally sell me on it, because like you said - the narrative tells you why in a subtle way, often.

The other thing is that two of the popular characters have thick accents, and I have to wade through stories where people haven't figured out how to write an accent without it bordering illegibility. It's that whole "understand the rules of grammar to be able to break them" thing, I think.

As for the Naco/Malbottom fic, if I could find it I would link! Neville could be all gulping and not able to tuck his teeth under his lip and Draco is scowling about his dad while Neville puts green ribbons in his hair. :DDDDD

[beadbeauty.livejournal.com]

I have no comment on the bad fic. What I do want to talk about is your icon. Holy crap that is so awesome.

Can you wash Marley's bed? Then can you wash HER?

2 kids home sick today. GOOD GOD does the sickness END? I think my children are attempting to be SUPER humans with insane immune systems. They are growing and building and becoming.... it's scary. Malaria? No problem. I can fight it off. Ugh.

HOW ABOUT THIS ICON, TIFFY-CHELLE?

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Nooneenooneenoo!

Sally is STINKY. SHe is a dirty doggy who is getting cleaned today, too. I will not wash Marley. Because she is far away.

Why are people so sick? Maybe my kids are sick, and I'm just ignoring them. Because it's all about ME. You gotta spend money to make money, Tiffany. (I so solly the chirrens are ill, though)

[entrenous88.livejournal.com]

POLAR BEAR!

Is he brokeded? *worries*

[sangueuk.livejournal.com]

Jeez! What's a 'piss gag'? :::Runs a mile and smacks into the wall of middle agedness:::

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

*cough*

only one way through the hose. In. YEAH, THERE'S YOUR BOUT OF DARKNESS FOR THE DAY. And now I'm off to drop off snacks to Emily's kindergarten class, hahahaha. [/shame]

[lettered.livejournal.com]

Apparently AJ Hall gets Neville and Draco there.

I like entrenous88's point about how it's possible to write a believable PWP even of characters for whom boning seems a logical leap to you. I like either the wilfull-pushing-ahead she mentions or some intimation of a past history that has brought the characters to such a point. I also like long, novel-length fics that explore that history in detail.

What I *don't* like are half-assed, longish one shots by authors who think that that's enough space to work characters entirely from point A to point B. It would be if you were using a big history and compressing to summary form, which only works well if said summary is bitingly witty and devastatingly insightful. It *isn't* if your "history" is the real time length of those pages, which just happens way too often with stock plots about getting stuck together or hurt apart or suddenly noticing the each other's fuck-imperative attraction.

Whew, that was ranty. I also have no idea of what fandom you are speaking.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

*rings a bell* Ding ding ding, YES. Yes yes yes. It's very much half-assed, very much Mary Sueing of desires (and forcing those onto characters that... Quite frankly, I think you can make just about anything believable with enough skill, but when a) you don't have that skill and b) you just want to write down a visual you got while having a wank then I'm most likely not going to read/enjoy it.

Which, obviously, is my opinion, and I'm not saying they shouldn't write their crappy little fics. :D I'm just more bemoaning the lack of people who write well in this particular fandom, given that the source material is really really clever.

I'm talking about the Metalocalypse fandom, which is a cartoon on Adult Swim. It's filled with girls who bemoan how their parents found their artwork and they can't play online anymore. And then I want to slit my wrists. (up the street and across the highway, because I know how. Haha. Ahem.)

Basically, I'm just bitching to bitch. :)

[anelith.livejournal.com]

It's so amazing to me that you have gardening items on your To Do list, when it's in the teens and twenties here -- brrr. But bright and sunny! I don't mind it so much when it's bright outside.

At first I thought you were talking about the HP fandom. That group seems to have a lot of kids running amok in it. But then you mentioned the Longbottom/Malfoy fic as comparison... ha ha ha. I get the picture.

Hope your list is going well. I spent the morning running errands myself, with about 75% success.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

It's been very pleasant and mild here! Fall/winter is a great time for us to get shrubs, trees and perennials in the ground. Our ground doesn't freeze like yours does. When we get stuff in during the cooler months, the roots have a longer time to develop (read: go deep) before the hot months come.

And no, not HP fandom. I only read a few trusted sources there, because of the WEIRDNESS. This fandom is for that show I keep going on about (and got a conversion: Moosesal, yay!) named Metalocalypse. It's frustrating, because the show is really REALLY clever. And you know how I am about music, so it's incredibly gratifying, this show. But the participants are still in HIGH SCHOOL. So... I a)don't think they get the references, because the creator of the show is my age and into the same music and b) get that it's a parody of so many things from my high school years re: bands.

Plus, this is the first time a bunch of them have been "exposed" to slash, so they don't get what slash is, first of all. Second, they have to feminize the men in order to write them, which ARGH. They are metal rock musicians. The lead singer of Judas Priest is gay, and he looks like he could chew through metal and spit it in your face.

I'm uh... I'm ranting here. :) I'm about to head out to the garden center to check on some pricing, and I think I'll have most of my list done. That's a good feeling, huh? Stay warm! Oh my gosh, the COLD WHERE YOU ARE!!!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

*puts a fatty in your eye hole*

[cityphonelines.livejournal.com]

Dude, why are you not schoolin' 'n' rulin' the Metalocalypse fandom?

The horticulturetress is back, baby.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHA. I got a hilarious bit of "concrit" to my last fic about how the "way time jumps around" was weird. 1) that's not concrit, that's just crit. 2) you're retarded. Not YOU you. Hahaha.

I'm listening to The Roots right now. I don't think that's a coincidence. SQUISH, GIRLIO. (your icon is v v pretty.)

[floweringjudas.livejournal.com]

This was my experience with American Idol and The Daily Show fandoms. ...JESUS, the headcases. Okay for srs? One of the BIG TDS FICS THAT ALL NOOBS MUST READ is about Jon Stewart, like, slashing his wrists or some shit like that after the '04 election results and Stephen Tenderly Nursing Him Back To Health Via Prescription Sausage Injection. The fahk?

And one of the big AI fics was about Clay being A Siren and stealing away Ryan Seacrest's free agency or something. ...though. I mean. It was American freakin' Idol, I should've known better.

Dude I want to write that Draco/Neville now. D:

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

oh my GOD the hot sausage injection WHY ARE YOU SO PERFECTLY IN SYNCH WITH MY BRAIN, Laura??? I have mad love for how you operate. AI fanfic. I---

A part of my soul just died.

WRITE THAT FIC, holy crap, you KNOW that is the best premise you've heard in like, three minutes. :DDDD

[semby.livejournal.com]

I'm not familiar with that fandom at all, but I just have to stick in that referring to people by hair color (or race, or whatever) rather than name is one of my biggest fic pet peeves in all fandoms ever. Not so much if it's used once every ten pages, but I've been burned by too many fics where people would use that method to describe every character in every paragraph. Ugh!