Is that ya ass, or ya momma half reindeer?

[stoney321]

I can't explain it but damn sure glad you came here! I like them cocky but leggy ones, black whitey Dominicans... Anyone? No? Nelly, Peed Iddy? (A-Listers: I'm bringing Donatella Versace back, because have you SEEN HER CANKLES??) Uh, off topic. Ahem.

Good morning!! Happy Monday! I'm in a TERRIFIC mood, enough to send you sprinklings of joy in case you have a Case of the Mondays. I'm waaaaaaay behind on responding to some awesome feedback I got for my Pickles the Drummer as a teen rent-boy story (dude, that is like, the nicest fb EVER there.) and various other things, but I'm SO HAPPY TODAY!! I can barely sit still. So, why so happy? So filled with joy? WELL LET ME TELL YOU.


My little sister, the wee tiny blonde Swiss Miss in this picture *points down* is GETTING MARRIED.



It's about damn time. Ahahaha. I kid. About the being made an honest woman part. Oh, I'm SO HAPPY for her and her fiancè, Chris. He's terrific and funny and gracious and thinks my sister is the most awesome and beautiful and talented person on earth. (D'awww.) So, I love him for that, alone. Also, he's really fun and sweet to my kids, and I looooooove cooking for him, and he makes my sister happy, and they've been together for almost 5 years now, and I'm just tickled pink. YAY.

Hey, Beth? Now I won't have to think you're a dirty whore for living in sin. AHAHAHA. (My sister is awesome and will think that's funny, so get yer britches out of a wad. This is how we roll in my family.)

YAY NEW BROTHER!!! Brothers don't shake hands! Brothers gotta HUG. (And seriously, Beth. He picked out the most beautiful ring. I LOVE YOU BOTH, EEEEE!)

Oh, and for those wanting a face to go with my awesome friend Alison, here:


(That's her on the right with the beer.) And she finally looks happy like in this picture again! I hadn't realized how long it had been since I'd seen her beam with joy since I started flipping through pictures. :( But she's happy now, so that's good! *hugs her to bits*

Oooh, what else? I had The Sex Talk with my son. (!!!) And he got very very quiet. And asked if he HAD to have babies, because he did NOT want to do that. HAHAHAHA. KEEP THAT THOUGHT, KID. I finished digging out EVERY SINGLE PLANT from the front of my house and re-doing my flower beds. WHEW. That was exhausting, but gratifying. I also put in a new climbing rose, Royal Gold that will go up the front of the house and combine over the bay window with my hybrid New Dawn. (Mine is hot pink, fades to pale.)

(And I found a climbing rose named GOLDEN SHOWERS. That's... an unfortunate name. Or, you know, I'm just... I'm just really broken inside. Probably that last one.)

Oh, and I forgot to wish dancetomato a happy birthday!! DT, if I had it together, I would have written you a story based on THIS IMAGE. Including a bj with teeth raking down his taut belly and weetiny treasure trail and all sorts of wrongness. Wrongness that is RIGHTNESS, am I right? Sure I am. Hahaha! Instead, I will just send you hope for continued health and happiness. *massive, bone creaking squishes*

The wind is picking up outside, so I need to get a move on so I can keep my good mood. I want to READ today. What are you reading? HOW ARE ALL OF YOU? Do tell! *props chin on fists, beaming*

Comments

[aimeelicious]

SO CHEERFUL! /climbs on your bandwagon

Many grats to your sister on her engagement, yay!!

The state of me is a sorry one, but I soldier on.

/does the twist in your garden

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

*passes out horns and streamers for the Kewl Kids on the bandwagon name JOY*

OH my god, dancing makes things grow BETTER!!! *cranks the music and does the Monkey* HEEE!

[josieobsessed.livejournal.com]

That is great news about your sister. My sister recently got married, so I know that it can be an emotional and joy-filled time.

Also, I just wanted to say that I love reading your journal because you never fail to make me laugh. Well, except when you talk about flowers and gardening and stuff, but that's just because weeding ain't my thang.

But otherwise, your LJ is crack to me.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I'm so happy about my sis - they're both just great people who compliment each other, YAY!!

I'm sorry my gardening talk is a bummer, hahaha. TOUGH COOKIES. :D I will, however, continue to bring the other flavors of crack, hee!

[thepiratequeen.livejournal.com]

Good morning, dahling! Glad you are in a good mood. I am in "Yay, I'm at work on a holiday for the rest of the office mood!". Actually I don't care at all because I am taking the day off tomorrow to have pizza with one of my favorite authors.

I already squeed all over her journal but I'll say it again, Yay Beth! And what cute kids you both were. *pinches cheeks*

I am rereading, A Song of Ice and Fire, the series written by the author I'm seeing tomorrow. But I already feel like I talk about it too much on my LJ so I'll shut up about it here.

*blows you Happy Monday kisses*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

GOOD MORNING, POOR LITTLE SICKY PANTS!! *hugs you to bits* And seriously: was she not the cutest little towhead ever????

Oooh, tell me about this book! I keep seeing it pop up every where. *pats next to me on the sofa*

[anelith.livejournal.com]

Sorry to break in here without an introduction, but... you're seeing George R. R. Martin tomorrow?

Awestricken here...

[southernbangel.livejournal.com]

Ooo, congratulations to your sister on her engagement! Those first few weeks of the engagement are always SO MUCH FUN! And yay, wedding planning! ZOMG CAKE TASTING! I think I was more excited over the cake tasting than anything else when Josh and I were engaged. Mmmm, cake....

The Sex Talk? Wow. Did you and Mr. Stoney tag-team him? (I remember The Sex Talks with my parents. Hello, let me die now. We're not big on talking about sex in my family. As in, we don't. Sex talk + my parents = a world of no. And dammnit, now I have "fun" sex talk associated with my parents and THAT IS JUST WRONG.)

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

YAY! I don't think they have a date set, or anything, more of an agreed: "let's do this" is what's happening now. *beams*

And Mr. S and Emily were off helping Alison move some big furniture and playing with her kids, so I was ALL ALONE. And he was very interested in everything I said, and was very freaked out. As in, "ewww, girls are gross and I have to WHAH?" My talk was by my dad, and he had CHARTS! And graphs! Hahaha. It was great, actually.

We were pretty comfortable talking about sex, my mother was a bit TOO comfortable talking about it. Ewww, SHUT UP, MOM.

[elfgirl.livejournal.com]

Yay! and Congrats for Stoney!Sis. :)

Golden Showers? Maybe the roses grow better when the dogs pee on them? O.o

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

YAY! *sends goodness on to her*

And I KNOW!! What a bad, bad name. Although... urine IS almost pure nitrogen. Hmmm. (Hee!)

[dancetomato.livejournal.com]

*esplodes all over your lj*
I had not seen the DR bottom. HOW DID I MISS THAT????

a bj with teeth raking down his taut belly and weetiny treasure trail
That phrase alone is worth turning 40 for. Well, almost. DOING that phrase would be worth turning 40 for.

Thank you for the lovely bday squishes and congrats to your sister!

*loves you long time*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

IS THAT PICTURE NOT THE MOST AWESOME THING?!? The GLUTE dents, oh my HEAVENS to Mergatroid.

I hope you had the best weekend EVER!!! *hugs you and Essene to BITS and PIECES and frosts you back together*

[ladycat777.livejournal.com]

Cheerful is good! I am not, so I will not harsh the buzz, but congrats on stoney!sis' engagement!!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Cheerful is GREAT! I'll pass on the lurve, YAYAYAYAYAY!

[slasheuse.livejournal.com]

STONEY MY COMPUTER JUST LOST THE LAST 1000 WORDS OF AN ESSAY DUE IN AN HOUR

I'LL BE PERSON ALLCAPING AND EATING CHOCOLATE AND TYPING LIKE. THE WIND

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

GO LOOK IN RECENT DOCUMENTS!!!!!!! OR CLICK ON FILE IN WHATEVER PROGRAM YOU WERE WRITING IN!! IT MAY NOT BE LOST, oh my GOD, Sophie!!!

*wrings hands*

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAhAHA, I didn't have flesh colored felt pieces for our felt board, but I did have books with pictures and this online book, which is fantastic.

I mean, I don't get why it's HARD. We talked about STDs, about how him thinking it was gross was his body's way of telling him he's not supposed to be having sex yet, what being a father meant re: responsibility, and meiosis, because I'm nothing if not a science nerd. Oh, and he thought condoms sounded painful. Hahaha.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

You should put a bunch of string around the band, THEN tape that, so you can have some color on the underside. Mmm, pretty. I HAD TAPE ON MY GLASSES BECAUSE OUR MOTHER WAS A CRACK WHORE WHO WOULDN'T SPEND MONEY ON ME. Because you have to spend money to make money. Go make me a Diet Coke.

I will TEWTALLY help you with flowers, what?!?!?! YES PLEASE.

Are you in a good mood? ME TOO. HEART.

[lynnenne]

I love happy you! Well, I love you all the time, but when you're happy I just want to twirl you around until you throw up. EW!! *twirls*

And big congrats to your sister!!!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I've been a downer lately, huh? I'M WORKING ON THAT. :D *hugs and squishes you*

I want you to twirl me! Come see me and twirl me, and I promise I'll take anti-nausea meds. Heh.

[moosesal.livejournal.com]

Golden Showers? Yeah, that's an unfortunate name. But thanks for the giggles.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I KNOW!!! Just... sometimes elderly rich women with too many cats shouldn't name species of flowers.

Okay, I had a picture for EVER of John Wayne, in GOLD HOT PANTS, I kid you not, getting a GOLDEN SHOWER from that midget that was in all the Hanna Barbera Kroft Superstar shows, Billy... Baird? Something like that?

I HAVE WONDERED DOUBLE YOU TEE EFF about that for YEARS.

[chrisleeoctaves.livejournal.com]

You should totally be a motivational speaker. (Although NOT like Matt Foley!)

You have more energy than 1000 suns.

You bring the joy- you really do.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

*adjusts glasses* Who am I looking at here, huh? Is that... is that Bill Shakespeare? Mom? Dad? Help me out here. [/Matt Foley]

I am literally bouncing in my seat with joy. Also, I'm listening to great music, which makes me hap-hap-happy. I send you sunshine and warmth!!!

Ahahaha, your ICON!! Yes, yes they do. Mmm.

[marenfic.livejournal.com]

Yay for rings and smiling friends and happy Stoney!

I was watching BSG last night and decided that what this world needs is a fic where Chef from South Park replaces Chief on the Galactica and I BLAME YOU. Crackfic is not my friend.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Okay, 1) I saw the first part of the pilot for BSG and I GET IT. Um, that was a really good hour of television. I say this because 2) I will understand why Chef from SP is good crack one sweet, sweet day.

HOW ARE YOU, MAREN? I hope you had a lovely weekend!

[rainkatt.livejournal.com]

::zeroes in on important part of post::

Golden Showers?!?? OMG, I would have laughed so hard, if I'd seen that in a nursery or a catalog! BAD name.

I'm glad you're in a good mood! ::hugs you::

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHAHA, I know, right?!?! Like: srsly. Dun name flowers after weird fetish, plz.

It's a beautiful rose, too. Not as lovely as the rambler Fecalphiliac, but still.

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

Yeah for weddings! I love family get togethers. Maybe the boy will get to wear a tux.

When A started dating his current girlfriend, dad sat him down and had a serious talk about sex and what not to do. They were both seriously embarrassed and hubby said, "don't do anything stupid and we'll never have to discuss this again."

A's (smartass) response? "Or, I could just not tell you and we still won't have to discuss this ever again."

Good luck with exploding hormones.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I love family get togethers, too! And weddings are the best kinds. Awww, I want The Boy in a nice suit and tie. The girls had the sweetest dresses made for them for the last family wedding - I can't wait for them to get girlified again.

And I'm getting ready to put on full battle gear in this battle of teendom, SHEESH!

[floweringjudas.livejournal.com]

YAY HAPPINESS. ♥!

[anelith.livejournal.com]

I'm so happy for you, and your sister! What a joyful post from you today. I know you are walking on air.

I'm laughing at A's response to the Sex Talk. So, so funny. I can only hope I approach one tenth of your calm and poise when it's my turn with our boys...

Right now I'm rereading Neil Gaiman's short story collection Angels and Visitations. Some of the stories in there are really memorable, such as "Troll Bridge," and "Murder Mysteries."

[entrenous88.livejournal.com]

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

Congratulations to Beth, to your soon-to-be brother-in-law, and to everyone in your family! What a wonderful thing!

Heee to Austin re: the sex talk! You won't have to worry about that one for a couple more years, sounds like!

[my_daroga]

Yay happy! Your post made me happy, just because you are so joyful. That's cool.

Also, your friend Alison is very pretty, and I'm glad she's looking happier (and perversely almost gladder that you got to help her move).

Also, haha at your kidlet and the sex talk. I can't even imagine. But I still don't want kids, so there's hope for the little tyke.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Oh, yay! I'm so glad that my spazziness hasn't driven people away, hahaha. Isn't she pretty?? She has the most beautiful eyes, too, and is just a lovely person. <3

Heee! Our talk was very good, I felt good about it, at least. Let's see how long he can hold off, huh? *locks him away for ever*