How to survive if you find yourself in a horror movie

[stoney321]

Don't buy the "special chili" from this guy:

If a house looks like it has eyes, and there were people killed in it, don't buy said house:

If your child takes on this appearance: It's time to spill a few (7 approximately) gallons of gasoline on the porch and drop a match.

This is NOT the heimlich maneuver:

Never (BUT NEVER!!) pick up hitch-hikers:

If you dream that you've had sex with a hell beast and wake up pregnant, do not accept special herbals and/or necklaces from these ladies:

Let's face it. Twins are evil:

And if you see dead people, pluck out your eyes and get a dog:

But not this dog:

Oh. And don't be black or have sex. Happy Hallowe'en!!!!
*mini-Almond Joys and Snickers in your bags*