Ahahahaha, awesome.

[stoney321]

In case y'all need to take me off any reading lists/RSS feeds, whatever, you should know that apparently I'm a "racist cracker." Oh, sweet sweet ironic statement of awesome!

Twilighter, of course. (reasoning: because I don't mock the black vampire in Twilight, I'm a racist. I also didn't mock any Javanese vampires, Eskimo vampires, or CHAV vamps, but that's because I secretly AM a CHAV vamp, innit though?)

Dear Internet: you are full of sparkle wonder and people who spend a lot of time on things they shouldn't. (Ahahaha, irony, wot?)
I love you, Stoney.

(I'm waiting to be told that my icon is racist. Or homophobic. Or makes them look fat. Take your pic. *G*)

Comments

[vixielamenta.livejournal.com]

OH NOES! Someone on the internet can't take a joke! /wrists

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I think they are the first one, too! On the entire internet, I mean.

Twilight bashing is SRS BZNS, you guys, won't someone think of the Asians? There was a DISTINCT LACK OF MOCKING ASIANS in that post, GOD I am such a racist cracker!!

[cityphonelines.livejournal.com]

you should know that apparently I'm a "racist cracker."

THIS IS NOT BRAND NEW INFORMATION. You've been oppressing me for YEARS now.

[vixielamenta.livejournal.com]

Personally, I'm offended by the lack of coverage of Jewish vampires in your post. People never really hear anything about them, either. So sad. Hold up a cross and they're all "....what, I'm sposed to cringe here? Put that thing down ya putz!"

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

EXCELLENT POINT. WON'T ANYONE THINK OF THE JEWISH VAMPIRES?

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

THAT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE TWO *BANG* TWO *BANG* TWO RACES IN ONE!

Double the racism from me to even you out, greedy guts.

[cityphonelines.livejournal.com]

That's it. I'm storming off in a huff to fry some chicken and make some beans. But not in a stereotypical way, I'M JUST HUNGRY.

[jenbooks.livejournal.com]

OK. This comment wins. :D

[cityphonelines.livejournal.com]

\0/ I like winning. It makes up for being a double-dipped minority.

[maybe1ce.livejournal.com]

(wants to be adis' New Best Friend)

[maybe1ce.livejournal.com]

If it's on the Internet, it must be true!

[dovil.livejournal.com]

Oh, my little bigoted biscuit, your icon is obviously Anti-English, what with it's reference to Prince Jug-Ear Charles - WHY CAN'T YOU SEE THE OBVIOUS TRUTH?! Which is both sad and hilarious. Why, even downtown Idaho thinks so, from wence I have an Islamic Taiwanese friend.

Also check out that pouty big nosed death mask on that guy, PHWAR!

Also, it's worth noting something that isn't, I use the word heck outing me out as a Mormon, something else irrelavent where I try and destroy your arguement and don't, but then call you a bigoted cracker.

In conclusion: your taste in music sucks.

/I get the boring emo crazies, you always get the fun ones!

[almlore.livejournal.com]

That was beautiful. I've been called a cracker once. I laughed so hard that I think I made the guy who said it just confused.

Here's a weird name for your collection. A friend of mine had a kid in her class called /she-THEED/. It was spelled S-H-I-T-H-E-A-D.

[anelith.livejournal.com]

Yikes these Twilight uber-fans are wacko!

Also, I'm in awe that the post you linked to has 622 comments (or something like that, I believe). Your inbox must have been jammed up.

[tabaqui]

*snickers madly*
Whoo hoo!

And....are they saying that...your ex-Mormonism isn't the right kind or something? OR that you are a stupid ex-Mormon who never really understood your own faith?

*is confuzzled*
*and amused*

[vixielamenta.livejournal.com]

Some of those Christian vampires are all "Oh, why couldn't I have been a vampire in Israel!?" (totally ripped from MST3K)

WIN

[slasheuse.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, you're great.

[slasheuse.livejournal.com]

How sparklefabulous would a chav vampire even be though?

IMAGINE CATHERINE TATE'S LAUREN AS BELLA

TELL ME IT DOESN'T IMPROVE YOUR DAY LIFE

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

Just like all of those Elvis sightings!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

See, I just hit on a phenomenon that is both a religious and pop culture combo of WIN. I'll create one for you to mock, then you can have fun, too!

...Adam Lambert and Judaism. Adam represents anti-Semitism, GO! (I figure that Muslim/Islam would bring about death threats. IS THAT IN ITSELF RACIST? I can't tell anymore!!)

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

NO. FUCKING. WAY.

I went to school with a "Shuh-theed" almost 20 years ago! Spelled the same way! IT HAS TO BE HER DAUGHTER/SON.

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I stopped replying to those a loooooong time ago. Every now and then I have to, though. Like this particular comment. :D

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I REALLY don't know his point, but dammit, HE BELIEVES IN IT, so good for him! Or something. LOL!

[stoney321.livejournal.com]

I NOW NEED TO REWRITE TWILIGHT WITH LAUREN AS BELLA. AND DA ALI G AS EDWARD.

IT IS TOO PERFECT OH MY GOOOOOOOOOD!

Da Ali G is all "Naw, I'm perfect, wot? Look at me shimmer! That is well fit." And Lauren would go, "I ain't bovvered."

AND THEN VICKY COMES IN AND IS ALL "Yar but, no, but, yar, but, no, but, 'im's WELL FIT!"

[slasheuse.livejournal.com]

he sparkles WITH BLING, STONEY. WITH BLING.

And she's like, yeah wevah, and he's like listen bitch, and she's all did you just call me a bitch? did you just call me a bitch? oh my god you're not biting me that's well gay

and vicki's all yeh but no but yeh but no you can't listen to edward cos carly finlan's brother saw him finger janine round the back of the ice rink and everyone knows she only dun it with a vampire becos she wants er tongue pierced and anyway don't listen to siobhan cos everyone knows she thinks immortal's just a song by that goth group when actually me and edward are soooo lush but anyway you can't trust her because she says jacob paid me two doughnuts and a rizla to give him a happy ending in the skip at morrisons but actually he never becos i dun it for free.