Dear writers: (mostly of fanfic)

Maybe this will help.

• occasion: there is no ass in an occasion. Or at least, there shouldn't be.


• pored over/poured over: pored over a story/words. Like you fell in because it's a big ol' nasty pore like on one's face. Pore=hole, pour=spill. You would have poured milk all over your cereal, you would have pored over the pages of a fantastic tale.


• then/than: then is time, than is a comparison. I then left to a drug-fueled orgy rather than attend church with Mother.


• its/it's: if you see an apostrophe SAY OUT LOUD: it is. Doesn't fit? Drop the apostrophe. It's quite simple: the gimp brought its cock ring to the occasion. We all pored over the instruction manual, then poured oil over its gears rather than the carpeting. The party went off without a hitch, regardless of the ass that came to this occasion. Who brings a donkey to a leather party? That's clearly unacceptable. (Tijuana/linen parties only, my lands!)

See?

When all else fails, READ WHAT YOU WROTE OUT LOUD. And please get someone else to read it before posting.

Love, someone who wrote "Hedwig and the Angry ITCH" yesterday and had another set of eyes catch it. It happens to all of us at some point. If you're doing the same thing over and over again every time? Make a point of getting a beta. It's not a sign of defeat or weakness, quite the opposite, actually.