Karma Laundrette

How the hell is it Friday already? And halfway through December? WHAT IS HAPPENING TO TIME I WANT ANSWERS.

Okay, there's a resurgence of posting on LJ, which makes me happy, so I want in on things. Questions for me? LEAVE THEM HERE and I'll do that post/question answer a day thing. Maybe multiple questions a day, who knows?

ION, there are some goodies on HDJM for you of the Supernatural, Sleepy Hollow, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer variety. Orphan Black is coming back soon, as is Hannibal. HOORAY! And a new show Black Sails will be added, and I am VERY EXCITED about that. (I wish I could nab Heathicorn from Tumblr to do Teen Wolf recaps, because she's ridiculously hilarious.)

SPEAKING OF DONATIONS (we were in my head), did you know that it takes the average HDJM writer fourteen million hours plus three human sacrifices to write up a recap for our site? I also require that they show me proof of broken legs before they're allowed to post. That's a lot of work to do something for free. (Okay, it usually takes a minimum of 6 hours from start to finish, not to mention the time spent replying to comments, marketing, crying when you don't get any feedback...) Should you find yourself with a few extra pennies on your hands, would you possibly consider making a donation to our site?

Now, I pay for all costs to run the site and will happily continue to do so as long as there is interest in HDJM (although it would be lovely to get income to push towards the hundreds of dollars I spend on yearly server fees, etc. But I'm not even asking for that.) I'm asking for you to support our writers, some of whom are attempting to get a career writing and are using HDJM as a battleground/resume thickener. I love sending them money when we get donations (and I send them ALL the money. I keep nothing, unless it's mentioned that they would like the money to go towards the site's operating costs.)

My girls work hard to provide a fun, safe place to be geeky and love on your favorite things without worry of trolls, hate, or wank.

If that's something that is important to you, maybe consider dropping a bill into the tip jar? (On the right side of our site is a DONATE button. I'm not even going to lie and say that the $2 donations we were given last year didn't choke me up. That tells me that money is tight for you and yet you STILL made it a priority to thank your writers. So freaking amazing. <3

I try not to harass my flist much. We keep on keeping on over there and enjoy what we do. But hearing that YOU enjoy what we do is the icing on the cupcake. (And feel free to link, repost, point this out to people you know who like our site as well.)

Imma bake some cookies today. Whatchu doon, Boo?

MINGING. Is the G hard like Grover? Or G, George? [ETA] Got it, thank you!!

(And you're welcome for that ear worm, if you're of an age.)

Is anyone aware of a shelter/organization with a proven track record in Houston for abused women? I'm not looking for what can be googled, I'm looking for a place that is KNOWN to help women get out of situations right after being contacted, for a place/organizations that is known for maintaining anonymity for their safety and a place that can deal with an abused woman who has children.

This person is a business executive who will need help regaining control over her finances, but take away that this means she won't require long-term placement in a shelter, just that push to get legal balls rolling.

I am leaving this post open on the chance that anyone scrolling by in the HOUSTON, TX area might see this. ETA If so, PLEASE MESSAGE ME OR COMMENT HERE and I will [privately] get you in contact with the SAFE PLACE to help you.

THANK YOU IN ADVANCE.

where I ask you to consider supporting Hey, Don't Judge Me in meaningful ways. :) (I rarely ask for support. It's a Leo thing.)

What with one thing and another, (DDoS/malware attacks, server issues) I'm making huge changes behind the scenes for HDJM. With the exception of three phenomenally generous donations to the site over the last year, the few advertisements that I was able to land for two months were the only source of income we've had. Advertising has dried up (people get nervous around malware; I can't blame them) and we're back to how we've run the site since its inception: my pocketbook.

I am happy to continue this site, and will for as long as there is interest. I believe in making a fannish place that is about JOY. Not mocking, not tearing things down with mean pleasure. Our site is not ironic. We genuinely enjoy what we recap. That's the rule. If you've felt guilty about loving something so much and maybe didn't feel comfortable sharing your squee in a place where it might get teased, WE ARE YOUR SQUEE-ZONE. There really aren't many places that provide that for fans. There's always a basher, shamer, whatever in the corner, right? Not here. LET YOUR LOVE LIGHT SHINE AT HDJM. :)

We've had amazing discussions there; we've had SHOW RUNNERS praise our site, not to mention some actors and their PARENTS thanking us for providing a place of happiness. I love it, and as long as I can afford to do so, I'll keep the site running.

But I want to be able to pay our writers more than just a prize at the end of the month if they're the top-viewed author. That's reasonable, right? For all of the time they put into the site? It's A LOT, trust me.

And now, with a much-needed move to a secure and dedicated farm, HDJM's expenses will go up 230%. This will ensure that we don't crash, that I have a dedicated staff of geeks to keep things tight on the server side, and that when you click a link, it blazes on your screen so fast your head will spin.

I know a lot of you have enjoyed our site. I've appreciated that support so much. Those of you who routinely share us on social media or through email, I see that you're sharing, and I'm even more grateful. But maybe those of you that enjoy our recaps regularly that don't share the site might consider slipping a dollar or two into our tip jar? Did you know we had one?. :) It's on the main page, on the right hand side under the list of shows we cover.

You get ad-free (unfortunately, lol) fan-based enjoyment regularly. That would be an AMAZING way to show our writers that you appreciate them. (If you are uncomfortable with PayPal, I'd be happy to provide alternative options for donations, as well. Um, no gently used clothing, please. ;D)

Final note: the more you share our site socially, the faster we'll grow with new users. That's the key for real, prolonged growth. And that draws advertisers. And that means revenue that I can share with the girls. I do not pay myself. All incoming money goes to direct payment of fees to maintain HDJM, or into payments to the other writers.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH. (And of course, we have a Cafe Press store that has cute tees and mugs and other things with images related to HDJM.)

(That's me. I'm the loving friend! SURPRISE! But first...)

FIRST: Top Chef! - The Recap Oh, my heart was broken in the "Last Chance Kitchen" series online (I won't spoil you. Also, I used Invisio-Text on the website) but I continue to stand by my other alliances.

SECOND: A Plea. I don't know if you realize that a lot of ratings are done through social media, but they are. Glee? They knew it was a hit because of how crazy it was on Twitter, Tumblr, etc. That's the new medium for a new generation of viewers. Nielson's are going away, social networking is the new gauge.

This is also true for, say, start up websites like mine. So when you share links on your blogs, on your tumblrs, tweet them, post to facebook... That brings a TREMENDOUS amount of traffic and interest in our site. And when you bring interest to our site, that includes great things like...investors and advertisers (they don't want to spend money on a site that doesn't get a lot of traffic, you see.)

Because here's the goal: I am trying to make a place for writers to earn money doing thing they love - talking about shows they love. It's all love there, there's no hate, no bashing... We love what we watch and we love talking about it in a fannish way. That's where we're different from, say, TWoP where they hate some of the things they recap/review. And who doesn't want more fannish love of things in media?

(And psst! If I can get paid advertising on my site - don't even mention Google Ads, they are DEAD TO ME - if I can get paid advertising on my site, I can not only pay the girls that work so hard to bring you entertaining reads, but we can join the TV Critics Association. We'll be legit. ALSO: WE WILL GET TO GO TO THE CONVENTIONS WHERE NEW SHOWS ARE DEBUTED. And finally get screeners! And talk to the writers, producers, and actors! Which means we can bring YOU recaps and discussions faster with inside information! BUT STILL IN A FANNISH WAY.

How awesome is that? And here's how easy it is: click "Like" on the bottom of recaps. Click "+1" while you're at it. Make with the clickity on Twitter. Share it on Reddit or Tumblr. Please link to us on your LJs, your facebooks. It's a button click, for the most part, and it helps us out TREMENDOUSLY. Please?

In the worlds of Bartles & James (omg, I am old) We thank you for your support. :)

THIRD: Someone took some quotes from "Where There's Smoke" and made some fun art around them. Very cool!

I keep going back and forth on what kind of furniture I want out by the pool. I have loungers already (they're these all-weather wicker beauties) and can't decide if I want an actual dining set or sofa/sectional/deep seating. The plans are to build an outdoor kitchen, which will have a bar area with stools. Now, things to consider: wet butts, older parents visiting, parties where we stay out late in the night gabbing.

[Poll #1722000]

The thing is, I need seating for at least 7 (my family + in laws, who visit a lot.) It will be under a large shade structure as well. My only concern with a sectional is that it would block off flow from the back door out to the rest of the area, because of where the space is. ( here's a general idea of the plan, minus furniture )

I really hated that show. I hate those "oh noes, we've gone from bad situation to worse, hurr!" stuff and why? BECAUSE IT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE. Exhibit A:

This morning I wake up, stagger to the kitchen, grab the coffee filter, and open the front door to let the dog out and dump the grounds into the garden, and all hell breaks loose. Everything in my house that could sound an alarm, does. I have three kids that stayed the night (6 kids total) and they all wake up terrified, crying, thinking the house is on fire.

Here's the thing: I don't have an alarm system. I mean, there's one that came with the house, but we don't have an alarm service. So there's no code I can enter, there's no tech support I can call to figure out how to disarm this. The dog starts howling, the cats are moaning, and the kids are yelling at one another. My husband is TOTALLY unhelpful (and is also over 1200 miles away.) I find the number for the alarm monitoring service on a placard that was put in a window by the original owners. That # now goes to a sex hotline.

I couldn't make this up if I tried.

I try disconnecting the fire alarms, no good. I go to the main power source for the alarm (*remember, the power is out on the block) and disable the main power line for the alarm. That makes a Klaxon warning siren sound to add to the fun. Tripping the breaker to that part of the house does nothing, btw.

After 15 minutes and random button pushing, it all goes off. The power comes back on. I guess that these two things are related.

Two hours pass. The power cuts out again (they're doing rolling blackouts to help distribute power up here) and it all goes off again. Oh my effing gee. I look up the panel online (I still have my good ol' iPhone) and see that there's a tech support #. Aaaaaand they're no longer in business. Of course. My son decides to go to the garage and get a new jug of milk which sets off ANOTHER alarm.

I unscrew the control panel by the front door and there is a HORNETS NEST IN THE WALL.

SERIOUSLY. I am not joking. I find a tiny eyeglass screw driver, unscrew EVERYTHING from the panel/motherboard and that one goes silent. I go to all of the other boxes and do the same thing. I should mention that I have vaulted ceilings, so I can't reach most of the fire alarms to turn them off, but they go silent when I go back to my closet and remove every single wire to the alarm panel.

If ever there was a reason to drink, this would be it. It's not even noon yet. There are supposed to be brown outs all day long. I hope I got all of the wires, good hell. (Oh and the older cat, Hope, pooped in her fright. OK, that's funny, even I can see that.)

SEND DRUGS. AND EAR PLUGS. AND WARM WEATHER. AND AN ELECTRICIAN. [ETA] Heard from one visiting child's parents just now that they had a similar situation happen with their smoke detectors. At 3am. And 5am. They disconnected the fire alarms to keep them from triggering, and have everyone on High Alert to monitor any smoke, etc. Good lord, what a mess.

I read the phrase "deep-seated" and was taken aback. I have ALWAYS thought that the phrase was "deep-seeded." Here's my thinking on why:

deep-seeded racism. Meaning, the racist ideas, etc. are buried deep, hence the seed metaphor. Yes, I am a gardener, this is how I think, lol.

So, if I'm wrong, what does "seat" refer to? Is this one of those turns of phrase that came from something else, a la, "mad as a hatter?" I'm corn-fused.

Also, I went to a fancy schmancy restaurant last night and had the Chef-Tasting/Pairing Course (3) and it was... oh my god, it wasn't good. This guy thought he was on Top Chef and I wanted to be Daddy Tom telling him why it was terrible. And the wine!! So mediocre and! And! The dessert course I got a Bailey's over ice (it's a WINE tasting) and a creme brulee soaked in coffee liquer. Now in theory, that sounds awesome. In execution it was sugar shock and soupy. Huh. (My main course was a fabulous chimichurri sauce over a Cowboy Rib eye. I would like to point out that I'm kinda small. Kinda. A cowboy Ribeye is almost 2 pounds of beef. Good. Lord. And it was a fatty cut of meat, too. I told him that it would have been better to match the sauce - which was perfect - with something small like a fillet Mignon, esp. a buffalo fillet.) Eh. The service was lousy, too. Hotel ZaZa is great, but I can't recommend their restaurant, Dragonfly. Three stars when they put on airs like they're 5. No, you're not.

ETA Check this article that compares the two: deep-seated and deep-seeded. THE PLOT THICKENS! (And thank you everyone that is chiming in.)

1. Do you number the pages on your manuscript? (Believe it or not, Writer's Market doesn't say!)
2. For non-fiction, should I include a Table of Contents? Should I put it in there before the prologue, just like a typical book? *head desk* I feel so stupid...
Have been told 1= Yes, 2 = Yes, Yes. If you know otherwise, feel free to chime in. :)
3. Would someone write my query letter to an agent for me for a plate of nachos? ;)

For those wondering what the hell I'm talking about, I think I've finally finished my book, Oh My Heck! An Insider's Guide To Identifying (and avoiding) Mormons.

(so people don't want electronic submissions typically, huh? Damn. It's so much faster.)

OT: happy birthday, Snow!
OT #2: I had a crap bottle of wine last night that tasted like apple juice with a dirty sock soaking in it. GROSS. Fortunately I had a bottle of bordeaux on hand to get the stink out. If you like overly sweet wine, or really fruity (to the point of being tropical) Reisling, that's your wine. you can have all of it.
OT #3: You can still play the music meme from yesterday! READ THE RULES. There's some fun music for downloading over there, too. Big thanks to those of you that shared your lists and the links to go with it.

[ETA] I have to record this: toasted bread, feta cheese, tomato slices, fresh basil leaves, cracked black pepper. This might be my lunch every single day for EVER. NOM NOM NOM. [/random]

Okay, I really really am hating Vista. Like, seething hatred. Like, it's my nemesis. The Captain "The hammer is my penis" Hammer to my Dr. *blink* Horrible. It's clearly designed for people who are really quite happy with AOL and basic, cartoony buttons. God, I miss NT.

I CANNOT get Azureus/Vuse to run on my laptop. I can get it to run on the home PC, but it won't let me get through the firewall on the laptop. Does anyone have any suggestions? The wiki had no help for multiple computers on a network, just the stuff I already know for the home PC. (And if I disable the ports on the home PC and try to open them on the laptop, it's a No Go.) BAH!

Positive things, because I don't like being negative:

• Third day of Personal Trainer workout yesterday, and it started getting easy. (!!) Time to add extra sets!
• Master Bootsie "McLovin" Collins of the Funkadelic (our newest cat) is lovely and is happy and content and has ventured out of the "holding tank" and is currently sitting on the table next to me in the living room. <3 he remains soft and snuggly.
• Trying to get my dog to accept new toothpaste made me laugh so hard yesterday that I literally fell over, laughing. That lip curl/obsessive lick/"gahk!" noise and face on a dog = hilarious.
• I bought actual girl products (I know how to use all the girly accoutrement, I just don't use them because I'm lazy) and I looooooove this new lotion: Vinotherapie by Caudalie. Smells delicious, and I feel like SILK.
• I bought perfume for the first time in... god, over a decade? (See: lazy.) Michael Kors, and it smells like honeysuckle and I just want to press my wrist to my nose all day long. MMmmMMmm.

I finished watching Angel: Season 5 last night. I've not watched a single episode from that season since it originally aired - I couldn't stand the thought of it being over, you know? :( Got completely choked up all over again, and have that "it's over" hurt, which sucks. But dammit, that was a good freaking show. <3 Those final three minutes, that building sound of the oncoming horde? Chills. And now I know EXACTLY what I'm writing for the lynnevitational. I just have to sit down and start writing. Yeah. I'll get on that aaaaaaany minute....